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azk3000

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azk3000
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 551
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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azk3000's FML badges

50 favourites

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

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azk3000's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28757) - you deserved it (133744)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

#1250407
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51519) - you deserved it (9858)

On 04/23/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, I noticed a spider on a female co-worker's shirt. I gently brushed it off. She accused me of sexual harassment. FML

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

#504108
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (132417) - you deserved it (4960)

On 03/21/2009 at 1:33am - intimacy - by willywonks (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pockets. Turns out, he had written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

#473847
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (116399) - you deserved it (11403)

On 03/19/2009 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by ufhdafuhds (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML

#798
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12567) - you deserved it (65849)

On 01/07/2009 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by Lou Czar - United States (Oregon)



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