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azk3000

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azk3000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 734
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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azk3000's page activity

Visits<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 2:02am<b>hillorie</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 12:24am<b>BulldogHoops</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 2:32am<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 8:41pm<b>sillybilly132</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 5:46pm<b>quincykid23</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 3:25am<b>Fenske_</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 10:48pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 2:12pm<b>wjh100</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 12:46am<b>MagicGiraffe</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 1:49am<b>breathemein</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 5:33pm<b>Blackcatluck</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 10:41pm<b>revolution4ever</b> - the 02/28/2013 at 12:45am<b>elletex</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 1:21am<b>kirbeaar</b> - the 12/19/2012 at 4:09pm<b>UberNova</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 7:21am<b>Futacy</b> - the 09/05/2012 at 4:17pm<b>mabel123</b> - the 08/31/2012 at 8:57pm

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azk3000's favorite FMLs

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

#20688045
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43502) - you deserved it (7430)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, I forgot to log out of my Facebook account before leaving for work. When I got back home, I discovered that my brother had gone through and commented "quack" on all my friend's duckfacing photos. She was not pleased. FML

#20588155
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (44224)

On 04/13/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by reallythough - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60524) - you deserved it (20224)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, my neighbours came to yell at me as they could hear my "shit music" through my window during the afternoon, so I turned it off. They then began to play their definition of "quality music" into the late hours of the night. I was listening to the Beatles. They blasted Nicki Minaj. FML

#20567871
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51688) - you deserved it (4771)

On 03/31/2013 at 2:24am - misc - by BornInTheWrongEra (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to visit my family for spring break, only to realize that I'd left my phone in my apartment. After a 2 hour drive back, I discovered my boyfriend with my neighbor. He panicked and pretended to be sleepwalking. FML

#20567746
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49187) - you deserved it (3529)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Maybe I'll stay longer than spring break. - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I had ordered near my seat. I immediately ran up to him and asked him to stop stealing my food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Seconds later the attendant came out with my actual food. FML

#20562925
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9168) - you deserved it (66637)

On 03/27/2013 at 9:02pm - misc - by Hahamaster333 -

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79678) - you deserved it (8236)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was over at a friend's house feeding her cats while she was on vacation. After feeding the four of them, I found an extra cat under the sofa. Thinking it was an intruding stray, I kicked it out. She actually has 5 cats. FML

#20548954
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12588) - you deserved it (51186)

On 03/18/2013 at 5:17am - animals - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

#20540752
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33454) - you deserved it (5048)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML

#20530533
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38870) - you deserved it (9404)

On 03/04/2013 at 2:36am - love - by married to wonder woman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39075) - you deserved it (10322)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I had to spend a few hours in a hospital with a toddler and a preschooler projecting vomit all over, because my husband thinks "expiration dates are for pussies." FML

#20511774
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35526) - you deserved it (4001)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38506) - you deserved it (9262)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML

#20502338
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28966) - you deserved it (7102)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19pm - love - by sofuckingembarassing. (woman) - United States



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