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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1641
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About auzzrage : Names jack im always on usually bored, message me :)

auzzrage's page activity

Visits<b>GrovertheGreat</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 11:52pm<b>James64138</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 6:09pm<b>oneloonyluna</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 1:58pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:00pm<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 10:32am<b>KRD5</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 12:27pm<b>booman342</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:33am<b>sof5047</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 11:11pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 5:39pm<b>mixximoo</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 1:20am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 7:07pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:59pm<b>volleyball2700</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:04am<b>baileybutler</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:02pm<b>LuckyKeylime</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:49am<b>asmiine</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 6:45pm<b>tanishpradhan</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 3:32am<b>MikaykayUnicorn</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:16pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 2:59am<b>KRD5</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 6:27pm<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 7:35am

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auzzrage's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

by sexyredhead / 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Intimacy

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

by datingamoron / 02/14/2011 at 2:14am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML

by alone / 02/14/2011 at 12:34am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML

by alice / 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

by Katrina / 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I got a text from a girl that I've had a crush on for a long time, asking me out to dinner. I agreed and went to the restaurant. Not long afterwards, I got text from her saying something had come up, so she couldn't make it. As I was walking back to my car, I saw her walk into the same restaurant with another guy. FML

by Saberwolf / 02/13/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML

by RyanM / 02/13/2011 at 4:01am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

by ihavepinkbackpac / 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous