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ashseal

Offline (the 09/27/2014 at 7:02am) | Search for a member

ashseal

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2584
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About ashseal : Hello

ashseal's page activity

Visits<b>Tyler1299</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 6:34am<b>gamerkz</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:43pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:32am<b>bjt916</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 5:43pm<b>PinkieKeen</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 11:42am<b>glowbaby</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:34pm<b>Jatingupta</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 5:29am<b>midnightm16</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 4:05am<b>Weemandarin</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 5:44pm<b>swint777</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 10:43pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 8:16pm<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:42am<b>evalu8tor</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:24am<b>rjc490</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 11:30pm<b>gama24</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 10:35pm<b>Flowtastic</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Shayaan</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:33pm<b>91hayek</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 8:42pm

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ashseal's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35825) - you deserved it (5383)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40740) - you deserved it (9462)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

#21138395
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49175) - you deserved it (7529)

On 05/13/2014 at 1:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58820) - you deserved it (5037)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, my car was found with a smashed window and a torn-apart steering column, in order to hot-wire it. The thief didn't get away with my car, though. The engine was in the garage, where I've been working on it for two days. FML

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18796) - you deserved it (51021)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

#17534409
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28648) - you deserved it (37652)

On 08/21/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Emily - United States (New York)

Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML

#17458169
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23576) - you deserved it (4656)

On 08/13/2011 at 6:22am - animals - by Ellencrazee (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I started to fall in love with my wife again. We are in the middle of a divorce. FML

#17457372
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37521) - you deserved it (16350)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:25am - love - by badass - United States

Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML

#16746621
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26320) - you deserved it (9849)

On 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm - health - by no one - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I told my five year old daughter that no, she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She retaliated by pooping in the living room and smearing it on the walls. My in-laws, whom I've been trying to impress for ages, are visiting today. FML

#16746008
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33330) - you deserved it (6767)

On 06/19/2011 at 2:03pm - kids - by screwedwoman27 - United States

Today, I explained to my 5 year old daughter that her older sister from my husband's first marriage lives with her mommy, and my daughter lives with us. She exclaimed, "It's not fair! I want two mommies like she has! Can we swap, I like her mommy better than you anyway!" FML

#16725685
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36162) - you deserved it (4494)

On 06/18/2011 at 5:40am - kids - by stepmom (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML

#16725425
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39931) - you deserved it (4455)

On 06/18/2011 at 4:51am - love - by screwed - United States

Today, I made the long drive to work, got out of the car, and realised that I'd forgotten to put shoes on before I left the house. FML

#16715265
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14733) - you deserved it (29668)

On 06/17/2011 at 5:24pm - misc - by Hannah - Ireland (Sligo)



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