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ashlyn_warren

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ashlyn_warren
  • Town/Country : kentucky, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 251
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ashlyn_warren : just the average girl who's obsessed with sports.
•equestrian
•volleyball player
•basketball and football enthusiast. ✌️
•Kentucky and Alabama fan
feel free to message me (:
Instagram: ashlynwarren_

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ashlyn_warren's favorite FMLs

Today, my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML

#19990567
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24563) - you deserved it (3941)

On 07/29/2012 at 9:34am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML

#19874038
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15676) - you deserved it (4491)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:30am - animals - by emi -

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

#19871781
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6165) - you deserved it (19563)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by rs (woman) - Egypt

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35973) - you deserved it (3779) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML

#19541511
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28750) - you deserved it (1752)

On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)

Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML

#18892690
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24398) - you deserved it (1816)

On 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I fell off a ladder while building a shelter for one of my wife's horses. I think I broke some ribs. I absolutely hate horses. FML

#18499022
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18347) - you deserved it (5078)

On 12/12/2011 at 10:47pm - health - by CessnaPilot - United States (Texas)

Today, my violent housemate qualified for a gun license. She picks up her bolt-action rifle on Wednesday. FML

#17863556
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21027) - you deserved it (1902)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Help. (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10052) - you deserved it (27699)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34422) - you deserved it (6616)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

#17315366
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23747) - you deserved it (15279)

On 07/31/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by James (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

#17068940
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21779) - you deserved it (17520)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

#15334821
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14611) - you deserved it (45265)

On 03/16/2011 at 9:01am - work - by Almostfunny (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44124) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML

#14585624
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11121) - you deserved it (44596)

On 01/15/2011 at 2:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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