This member hasn't filled in their description.
ashl123's FML badges
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
ashl123's favorite FMLs
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
by JC / 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML
by Shantwozzlah / 03/26/2012 at 12:15pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML
by ohhdear.___. / 03/26/2012 at 10:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by BookBabe / 03/25/2012 at 11:34am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by ohno / 03/25/2012 at 9:11am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by Avery / 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (California) / Geek
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML
by PUA / 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by PixieWrists / 03/13/2012 at 1:33pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health
by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Fraser / 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML
by fmlsomuch / 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm / Japan / Miscellaneous
by fmylifebigtime / 02/25/2012 at 9:35am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by KittenNomNom / 02/22/2012 at 2:40pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I received the first compliment from the opposite sex that I've gotten in months, from an elderly, cross-dressing man in the parking lot of Goodwill. Apparently my clothes look like they'd be "exciting to try on." FML
by mishie1 / 02/21/2012 at 7:44am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…