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ashl123

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ashl123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3122
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ashl123's page activity

Visits<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 1:34am<b>Nicolasaur726</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 9:39pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 12:33pm<b>ahlexus</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 2:11am<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 7:07pm<b>sofuckinglonely</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 11:53am<b>ms_fancypants</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 2:31pm<b>born_to_die</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:42pm<b>anormalperson</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:23am<b>curticus</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 6:26pm<b>collicott</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:00am<b>julesvasquez</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 2:30pm<b>redwolf213</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 11:28pm<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 12:38pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:47pm<b>princesshifi</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 8:18am<b>stupidioter</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 3:39pm<b>AliceWhovian</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 10:05am

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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ashl123's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22931) - you deserved it (6230)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned that if you're going to use vicks vapor rub for a cold, you should remember to wash your hands before changing your tampon. FML

#19790692
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29233) - you deserved it (16006)

On 06/15/2012 at 2:19am - health - by sickness_sucks - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

#19788440
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50090) - you deserved it (3382)

On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (2735)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29350) - you deserved it (2825) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11595) - you deserved it (42863)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

#19682048
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34913) - you deserved it (9347)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:15am - intimacy - by ilovemymomma - United States (Texas)

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

#19650159
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26716) - you deserved it (3028)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

#19646260
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40587) - you deserved it (5344)

On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML

#19633207
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8973) - you deserved it (36156)

On 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend walked in on me as I was browsing a baby name website. I explained to him that I was naming characters for a novel I was planning to write, but he is completely convinced that I'm pregnant, and has even told his parents. FML

#19631017
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25274) - you deserved it (3502)

On 05/16/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by inapickle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

#19627538
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23773) - you deserved it (7840)

On 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm - misc - by FML (woman) - Finland

Today, I'm on a trip to Poland with some friends. We came to experience the country's culture, and to challenge our preconceptions about this part of Europe. We had sat on a bench, and not ten seconds later, a stranger approached and asked, "How much for your friend?" FML

#19626954
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20439) - you deserved it (2525) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/15/2012 at 11:59am - misc - by LearnToLive -

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

#19626087
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25755) - you deserved it (2376)

On 05/15/2012 at 4:08am - intimacy - by uni life (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML

#19611170
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20686) - you deserved it (4100)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:36am - work - by picklet (woman) - Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan)



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