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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3848
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About asdfjkl123456 : No

asdfjkl123456's page activity

Visits<b>int15</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 3:35pm<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 1:45am<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 10:39pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 6:47pm<b>CarlCarlCarl</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 5:00pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 9:25pm<b>bonjourhello</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 10:18am<b>jill97</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 8:27am<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 4:29pm<b>DarkLink9001</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 7:48pm<b>fooad444</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:34am<b>moosemanjinkurs</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 3:48am<b>zefronke8</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 7:20am<b>captmiller1</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 1:32am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 3:34pm<b>shay_serendipity</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 10:25pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:19am<b>savannahleiggh</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 5:33pm

asdfjkl123456's FML badges


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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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asdfjkl123456's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (South Carolina) / Money

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy

Today, I sat through an incredibly long and tedious class lecture. Just as my professor was nearing the end of his lecture, the resident stoner loudly yawned and asked what we'd been talking about for the past hour. We got to hear most of the lecture all over again. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 12:44pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 20-year-old came whining to me, asking why his job interviews keep going so poorly. I had to delicately explain that the "PIMP SLAP" tattoo he had put on his right hand recently may have something to do with it. FML

by ProudMother / 03/06/2013 at 1:04pm / United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin) / Kids

Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML

by ghgfd / 03/06/2013 at 9:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was walking to my professor's office. I've had an upset stomach all week, and I still felt a little gassy, so I politely decided to pass gass before entering the room. More than just gas came out. FML

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

by parental failure / 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML

by jkbeynon / 03/02/2013 at 11:18pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my roommate told me that she wants to get some of those "My Family" stickers for her car. She's single and has no children. What does she want to get? One for her, and one for her goldfish. Sadly, this is probably one of the most intelligent things she's said all week. FML

by dumbass for a flatmate / 03/02/2013 at 9:35pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML

by panicelement / 02/27/2013 at 2:17am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

by Frostbitten / 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health

Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 11:14am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML

by mypelvishurts / 02/23/2013 at 2:32am / United States (California) / Work