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asdfghjklana

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asdfghjklana

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4618
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About asdfghjklana : Hi, I'm Alana and have no life whatsoever

asdfghjklana's page activity

Visits<b>clubbing4life</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:01pm<b>iSonia</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 8:46pm<b>Gaber64</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 9:52am<b>brittanymarie15</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 3:51am<b>nightninja22</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 3:28am<b>Stypahorlikson</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:09pm<b>Brock_Dudeson</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:41pm<b>hiitsmeeeeeee</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 12:52pm<b>xALEXx</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 8:33am<b>Yezetnia</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:41pm<b>PerditaDessa</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 11:22pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 1:28am<b>Make_Believe</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 7:27pm<b>Uncgirl</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 7:01pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 3:25pm<b>Ramell</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 6:43am<b>R3Dx</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 5:13am

asdfghjklana's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of asdfghjklana's badges

asdfghjklana's favorite FMLs

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
192 comments

Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML

#21142903
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39573) - you deserved it (6517)

On 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by her mom raised her (man) - Mexico

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

#21142112
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47765) - you deserved it (13567)

On 05/16/2014 at 6:25pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66924) - you deserved it (4949)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59910) - you deserved it (5136)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

#21134608
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40995) - you deserved it (3528) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2014 at 4:48pm - animals - by gvmfvr - Sent from mobile version

Today, I read that egg whites make a good hair treatment. Everything was going fine until, without thinking, I turned the hot water on to wash it out. I'm still picking the cooked egg out of my hair. FML

#21129302
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24648) - you deserved it (32346)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:57am - misc - by EggHead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss told our production department that we're not allowed to be happy. FML

#21129081
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38177) - you deserved it (3205)

On 05/02/2014 at 8:03pm - work - by i guess (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend got the brilliant idea of trying out a sex tip dreamed up by one of the glorified trolls at Cosmo. I think my balls are broken beyond repair. FML

#21127421
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43999) - you deserved it (6217)

On 04/30/2014 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by FMBs (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a fancy restaurant for her birthday. I'd arranged beforehand for some of the staff to come out and sing happy birthday to her, but it all backfired when she started panicking and had a serious anxiety attack from all the attention. FML

#21124555
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44502) - you deserved it (7803)

On 04/27/2014 at 6:08pm - love - by phuckbukket7 (man) - United States

Today, my long-distance boyfriend got extremely drunk and insisted that we ran the Skype call all night so it was like I was there with him. I woke up to the sound of him vomiting loudly at 3am. FML

#21124188
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38444) - you deserved it (5494)

On 04/27/2014 at 9:43am - love - by Amy (grossed out) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my Spanish teacher imitated the sound of a coffee grinder, and then said in Spanish, "OK, all of you do it." I did it, thinking everyone else would too. I was the only one in the class who'd understood the Spanish part. FML

#21121714
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41208) - you deserved it (4755)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:32am - work - by me - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from a girl I've had a crush on for a while. As I was about to accept it, it vanished. She explained later that she clicked on my name by accident, and didn't actually want to be friends at all. FML

#21121713
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44427) - you deserved it (3563)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:30am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML

#21119041
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51776) - you deserved it (14512)

On 04/21/2014 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by sexual parrot -

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41588) - you deserved it (6661)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)



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