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Offline (the 03/18/2015 at 4:15am) | Search for a member
About asdfghjklana : Hi, I'm Alana and have no life whatsoever
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her frst boyfriend is a special one cuz 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my vrginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML
Today... wilst laying in bed wit my girlfriend... se received a flirty message from er ex on er pone asking if se wanted to go to te cinema. Se replied... knowing I could see te screen. Te messages were signed wit a love eart and about 15 kisses. Se claims tey are still just friends. FML
today my usband again lost is keys!! It's a daily struggle to fine tem!! Tis time tey were in an ice cube, literally!! He said e must ave accidentally puttd tem in tere wen making ice!! He's going to be te fater of my future cildren!! FML
2day I found out y I recieve random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML
Today, I Babysat An 11 Year Old Kid While His Parents Ate Out. As Soon As They Left, The Kid Asked Me If I Wanted To Be On The Sex Offender's List. Before I Could Even Process That, He Told Me To Stay Out Of His Way An He Wouldn't Accuse Me Of Anything. FML
Friday 27 March 2015