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arrow007archer

Offline (yesterday at 10:18am) | Search for a member

arrow007archer

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 23 October 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 225
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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arrow007archer's page activity

Visits<b>njgohard</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 8:43pm<b>hotel135</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 12:40am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:19pm<b>unnamedperson1</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Bretzelife</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:22am<b>shelb0201</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:07pm<b>Betterthanu123</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:56pm<b>MonkeyKi</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:33pm<b>AllStache</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:44pm<b>KCToxic</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:12pm<b>Epic_Kassi</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:53pm<b>missmum2010</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:19pm<b>KaylaShadow</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:43am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 5:01pm<b>sarah1024</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 10:34pm<b>LaPollaLoca142</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:54pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 10:32pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 9:47pm

arrow007archer's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of arrow007archer's badges

arrow007archer's favorite FMLs

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41166) - you deserved it (5068)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

#21268936
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19496) - you deserved it (39839)

On 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm - misc - by ThatNewCarSmell (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad forgot I was on the back of his motorbike. He did a wheelie and I fell off. FML

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36966) - you deserved it (2962)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45723) - you deserved it (7611)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to awkwardly grab my pink dildo after my husband's friend asked what it was that my dog was chewing on. FML

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48622) - you deserved it (7749)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49790) - you deserved it (19642)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, one of my customer's pipes were blocked. As I went to unblock it, about a handful of used condoms collided with my face. I don't know if I should be disgusted by this or disgusted by my customer. FML

#21231545
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44051) - you deserved it (3844)

On 08/07/2014 at 5:09am - intimacy - by failallday (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

#21231132
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37755) - you deserved it (2589)

On 08/06/2014 at 6:18pm - kids - by whymyroomthough (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37036) - you deserved it (4546)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my dad was doing FaceTime with a friend. He turned his iPhone towards my sister and said "There's my daughter..." He then turned it to me and said "...and there's my ugly son", then walked away. I'm still not sure if it's a joke or not. FML

#21227050
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37335) - you deserved it (3256)

On 08/01/2014 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

#21226819
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53860) - you deserved it (3652)

On 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42514) - you deserved it (4372)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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