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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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arbw090583

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arbw090583
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 September 1983 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 2304
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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arbw090583's last visitors

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arbw090583's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of arbw090583's badges

arbw090583's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (10143) - you deserved it (1654)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML

#18907383 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (8186) - you deserved it (1062)

On 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by wish.was.single (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know..." and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML

#18864868 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (7669) - you deserved it (500)

On 01/20/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by shellski (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (11292) - you deserved it (1741)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML

#18842582 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (6711) - you deserved it (1386)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:30am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

#18841081 (240)

I agree, your life sucks (9560) - you deserved it (773)

On 01/18/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by meh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML

#18778372 (302)

I agree, your life sucks (3218) - you deserved it (12065)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm - misc - by ThatOneGirl646 - United States (Michigan)

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

#18758727 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (18134) - you deserved it (913)

On 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by fuckparents (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news: I'm probably not the father. FML

#18728659 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (11740) - you deserved it (847)

On 01/06/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (9673) - you deserved it (2478)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (8623) - you deserved it (1967)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML

#18625590 (305)

I agree, your life sucks (9567) - you deserved it (1457)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

#18613210 (175)

I agree, your life sucks (8506) - you deserved it (29952)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:35am - misc - by Paige - United States (California)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (10677) - you deserved it (663)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

#18468865 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (10261) - you deserved it (767)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by Vince (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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