ankafi

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ankafi

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 July 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5507
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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ankafi's page activity

Visits<b>LilMsDulce</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 2:44pm<b>Black_Knight80</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 5:24am<b>dutchy86</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:35am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 8:45pm<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 9:40am<b>loveexgirl</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 1:48am<b>aaronyetter</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 1:56pm<b>rob02</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 8:20pm<b>Ambient25</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 8:44pm<b>ladyfingers</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 9:53am<b>dalink</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 7:54am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 11:46am<b>Sjus</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 4:49pm

ankafi's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of ankafi's badges

ankafi's favorite FMLs

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

by fmlifer / 11/04/2011 at 12:29am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I got my period. Last week, I fell out of a window and landed between my legs on a bush; I have massive swelling down there, and stitches over the ripped flesh. Now I'm bleeding out my period on top of the lingering wounds down there. It hurts even to pee, let alone menstruate. FML

by stitchesupmyass / 11/01/2011 at 5:50pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 7:39pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

by Miroslav208 / 10/20/2011 at 10:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

by tommyboy783 / 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

by Nixontones / 10/14/2011 at 11:09am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

by scewable / 10/13/2011 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Devastated, he withered onto the floor into an inconsolable wreck in front of dozens of people. The ribbon of embarrassment that went down my spine was too much for me to handle, so I had to tell him I was "only joking." FML

by backtosquareone / 10/04/2011 at 1:22am / Asia/Pacific Region / Love

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

by hardtoignore / 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML

by anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 10:18am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML

by Yuuucky / 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous