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ankafi

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ankafi
  • Town/Country : Flourish and Blotts, Diagon Alley
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 July 1995 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 351
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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ankafi's favorite FMLs

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14568) - you deserved it (50499)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25979) - you deserved it (3963)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

#20498986
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14419) - you deserved it (33696)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

#20495428
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (27678)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

#20489402
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48217) - you deserved it (2814)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31547) - you deserved it (1345)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25310) - you deserved it (3966)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

#20478132
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23568) - you deserved it (3236)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm - love - by vagina dentata for christmas, pls (woman) - United States

Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML

#20476700
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34432) - you deserved it (2463)

On 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by frozensolid (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29557) - you deserved it (2564)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23465) - you deserved it (2076)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I've been struggling with my English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate. This is because my mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about what a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML

#20452365
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25096) - you deserved it (1792)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML

#20450090
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22453) - you deserved it (1685)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:23pm - misc - by Darkandcold - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

#20447129
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36693) - you deserved it (2015)

On 01/07/2013 at 11:16pm - misc - by legitweirdo - United States (New York)



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