About angel1234567 : I bet your life sucks more than mine ;)
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angel1234567's favorite FMLs
Today, while shaving my nether regions, I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm virtually having a second period, and it hurts to close my legs. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm / Italy (Calabria) / Health
by eww. / 03/22/2013 at 1:28am / Australia / Love
Today, at a science-fiction convention, a woman came up to me and told me that my white face paint was a mess, my contacts looked cheap, and my costume was an all-round failure. I wasn't wearing a costume, I'm an albino. FML
by Anonymous / 03/19/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/19/2013 at 9:27pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by inconnue / 03/18/2013 at 6:34pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love
Today, my boyfriend informed me that from now on during sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I need the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
by Ann / 03/18/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was over at a friend's house feeding her cats while she was on vacation. After feeding the four of them, I found an extra cat under the sofa. Thinking it was an intruding stray, I kicked it out. She actually has 5 cats. FML
by anonymous / 03/18/2013 at 5:17am / United States (California) / Animals
by Susan / 03/18/2013 at 4:59am / Ireland / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML
by Cliché... or Touché? / 03/17/2013 at 5:07am / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/16/2013 at 11:51am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids
Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste". Gag me. FML
by butnotlikethat / 03/15/2013 at 8:05pm / China (Jiangxi) / Intimacy
by ipaid350dollarsfornothing / 03/15/2013 at 3:09am / Qatar / Miscellaneous
by fmlman / 03/15/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Wyoming) / Miscellaneous
Today, my fiancée and I showed my mother-in-law a picture of the location at which we'll be holding our wedding reception. It's a beautiful waterfront building overlooking the ocean. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Looks like a good place to commit suicide." FML
by Anonymous / 03/14/2013 at 10:40am / Latvia / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/13/2013 at 9:47am / United States (California) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…