andydawg8891

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andydawg8891

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 23 April 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 29012
  • Number of comments : 87
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About andydawg8891 : I'm just a small town girl, living in a lonely world, but I took the midnight train going anywhere.

andydawg8891's page activity

Visits<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 4:14pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 5:53am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:13am<b>kukumber</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 9:29am<b>appi</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:27pm<b>rackyjr</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 2:23pm<b>Buhhhlainaaaa</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 2:40am<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 10:15pm<b>Plastinate</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:51pm<b>babyladuke</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:26pm<b>itzypedia</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 11:55am<b>umidontrember</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 10:47am<b>sinathedreamer</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 11:27am<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:05pm<b>aidankelly</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:01pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 4:26pm<b>therosh</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 5:03pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:37pm

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 10:14pm

andydawg8891's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

andydawg8891's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over for the first time. When the officer came up to my window, I immediately burst out into tears due to nervousness. He kept asking me for my licence and registration. Hysterical, I wasn't able to comply. He arrested me for not cooperating. FML

by daisyann / 07/15/2009 at 7:55pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a neon themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML

by paddy / 07/14/2009 at 8:23am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the mall and had to parallel park. It took me 10 to 12 minutes of maneuvering before I got into the slot. When I turned off the car and got out, there were 8 people laughing hysterically and clapping for me. FML

by greek_dancer / 07/13/2009 at 1:14am / United States / Transportation

Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend picked me up to come spend the night at his house, and on the way he started pulling over to get some condoms. I told him no need, I was on my period. He turned the car around and took me home. FML

by onething / 07/08/2009 at 1:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that a Ph.D. in Mechanical Engineering does not offer enough knowledge and experience to accomplish some simple, everyday tasks. I have spent the last 12 years designing large robots to scour the seabed for shipwrecks yet the mechanism used to unhook a bra eludes me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 10:39pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my friend and I were in her moms car talking about which job was harder: actor or artist. I said, "Art is easy. You just scribble on a piece of paper and call it abstract art." Her mom squinted at me in the rearview mirror and my friend stopped talking. Then she said, "My mom is an artist." FML

by URGH / 06/28/2009 at 6:08pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

by anonyme / 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking down the sidewalk and heard a little girl ask her dad why I had blue hair. He said, "Sometimes drugs will make people do stupid things." FML

by bluehairedfreakgirl / 05/31/2009 at 11:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

by rain / 05/31/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML

by Jerrrr / 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother came up to me at swim meet and shouted to me in the bleachers "If you have to go potty, go now because there is a long line!". I'm seventeen. FML

by embarassed / 05/25/2009 at 12:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friends house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML

by ninjawhat1337 / 05/25/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friends house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML

by ninjawhat1337 / 05/25/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML

by Ouch / 05/22/2009 at 11:16am / United States (North Dakota) / Transportation