andruha1123

Search for a member

andruha1123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 October 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14505
  • Number of comments : 582
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About andruha1123 : Go back to the kitchen and make me a sammich, woman!

andruha1123's page activity

Visits<b>Dilexar</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 4:57am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 9:46am<b>Westifer</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 7:26am<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 4:35pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 12:37am<b>pessimistprime</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 9:54pm<b>nezumii</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 10:16pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:14pm<b>cmonger</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 8:34pm<b>ZynexFin</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:03pm<b>notsorandomguy</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 3:13pm<b>failalltheway</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:28pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:02am<b>chrissapp</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:28pm<b>brwolfie</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:17pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:26am<b>mockingbooks</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 10:01am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 2:54am

andruha1123's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of andruha1123's badges

andruha1123's favorite FMLs

Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML

by Randall / 01/25/2011 at 2:28am / United States (California) / Health

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, one week after my girlfriend berated me for not being invested enough in our relationship, I proposed to her. Her answer? "I meant give me an orgasm, not a ring!" FML

by Limalia / 01/24/2011 at 4:00pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

by edwinduarte1 / 09/13/2010 at 2:49am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got the car of my dreams. My daughter also learned how to write her name. Now I have "LAUREN" across the side of my car. FML

by llozano715 / 09/13/2010 at 1:41am / Kids

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

by Username / 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm / Kids

Today, I had to play Paper, Rock or Scissors and beat my boyfriend in order to get him to take a shower. FML

by Today / 09/06/2010 at 10:26pm / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend got scared of a fly, freaked out, and accidentally punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2010 at 12:25am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He and I were in the middle of sharing a romantic shower following something of a dry spell when he bent over, spread his cheeks apart and asked, in earnest, "is there a worm sticking out of my ass?" FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2010 at 12:20am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I took some friends out to the woods to show them a natural spring. I explained to them that the water bubbles up from under ground, and that it's clean and tasty. I bent down and drank a few hefty handfuls only to look up and see a dead raccoon floating near me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2010 at 1:22am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I took some friends out to the woods to show them a natural spring. I explained to them that the water bubbles up from under ground, and that it's clean and tasty. I bent down and drank a few hefty handfuls only to look up and see a dead raccoon floating near me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2010 at 1:22am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, while I was working at child care, I told a two year old not to hit. He threw a bucket at me that bounced off my forehead. FML

by kaytay2469 / 09/05/2010 at 12:44am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, after doing it with my girlfriend, she told me that she was "faking the whole time, and thinking of talking cupcakes." FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2010 at 12:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I found out what "supersoaked" means. I thought it meant getting shot by a water gun, which is why I laughed when my daughter's boyfriend said he "supersoaked" her. FML

by FMyLife5915 / 09/04/2010 at 12:15am / Intimacy

Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML

by lalalasmiles06 / 09/03/2010 at 11:47pm / Health