analisemarie

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analisemarie

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 March 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3354
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About analisemarie : I didn't chose the thuglife; my mom picked it out for me.
Music, poetry, cheer, tumblr, longboarding, and dance are my life ✌
16 years of age, just your average teenage girl. Cali born, Oregon raised. High aspirations.
Twitter & instagram are @analisemarieee❤
Check out my tumblr angeltearsmermaidhair.tumblr.com❤
I follow back

analisemarie's page activity

Visits<b>Hunter_the_Ninja</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 10:25am<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 2:22am<b>TheSinisterUrge</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 4:40am<b>arich6210</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 3:33pm<b>Henriqu3e</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 7:26am<b>rhiannahoward14</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 12:17am<b>PePziNL</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 9:08pm<b>finiclepie</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 12:40am<b>kingghidorah</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:34am<b>lokland</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 7:33pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 4:17pm<b>itsfreakinliv</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 9:14pm<b>kirasen</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 7:05pm<b>Mahenoor</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 11:17pm<b>mrz1177</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 12:54am<b>hannah0987</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 5:28pm<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 3:59pm<b>Pevira</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 1:23am

analisemarie's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of analisemarie's badges

analisemarie's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

by anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

by yummy / 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML

by BCBUDDY / 05/07/2011 at 11:29am / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2011 at 2:05pm / United States / Health

Today, I ran into an old friend from college on the bus to work. Having not seen each other in over 10 years, we spent a good 15 minutes talking about our lives after college. At the end, he asked me what my name was. FML

by Jaggu / 04/29/2011 at 4:25pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out via a Twitter post that my girlfriend is pregnant. FML

by Tweety / 04/09/2011 at 7:40am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML

by ghoul / 03/08/2011 at 6:32am / Animals

Today, I was invited to a counseling group for people with emotional problems. I brought the permission slip home for my mom to sign, only for her to accuse me of being a hypochondriacal, lazy, selfish bitch. And my friends wonder why I have problems. FML

by PissedAtLife / 02/23/2011 at 3:37pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

by Shane / 02/08/2011 at 2:58am / Work

Today, my mom and I were escorted out of the KFC because my mom tried to mug and pick a fight with another customer. FML

by lifesux / 02/05/2011 at 4:28pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML

by dadum / 01/27/2011 at 2:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

by mortified / 01/22/2011 at 11:04am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

by fmlalways / 01/22/2011 at 8:00am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids