amrik

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amrik

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3290
  • Number of comments : 140
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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amrik's page activity

Visits<b>LolitaLena</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 11:14pm<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:35pm<b>snoop_hoggy_hog</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:21am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 4:47pm<b>amandagedaria</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 10:28pm<b>Berber260</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:05pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 12:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 3:05pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:54pm<b>moldypickles</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:34am<b>MrBlue999999</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 11:27pm<b>sethsmith11</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:02pm<b>hafyyyy</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 1:41pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:02am<b>mountainmanmike</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 5:30pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:50am<b>mkmon7</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:56am

amrik's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of amrik's badges

amrik's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML

by chi-huaHUA / 12/04/2010 at 2:08am / United States / Animals

Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 1:50am / Singapore / Kids

Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 1:50am / Singapore / Kids

Today, I asked my boyfriend what celebrity I look like. He thought long and hard, then said "Sarah Jessica Parker." I gasped and told him that I find her extremely hideous. He replied "So do I." FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 7:26pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I bought one of my favorite albums from when I was growing up. When I looked at the liner notes, I learned that my favorite song on the album wasn't about taking a bath, but about going to a brothel. My second-favorite isn't about moving, but about suicide. My childhood just shattered. FML

by nilssonfan / 11/17/2010 at 3:08am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2010 at 3:31am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 12:01pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I hurt my jaw after I got hit by a car. While receiving medical attention, the paramedic accidentally punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2010 at 7:37am / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Health

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

by gorillalove / 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML

by Jill Shanks / 09/01/2010 at 2:16am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

by incestastic / 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my boyfriend texted me, and asked if he could come over to 'have some fun'. Thinking we were going to do it, I freshened up. Turns out his idea of 'having some fun' is playing Doodle Jump and Angry Birds on my iPod. For three hours. FML

by kylie / 08/10/2010 at 3:22am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

by Embarressed... / 08/04/2010 at 6:25am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy