amrik

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amrik

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3531
  • Number of comments : 140
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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amrik's page activity

Visits<b>swervelol</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 2:02pm<b>Rascal_Rehab</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 1:25pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 7:50pm<b>LolitaLena</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 11:14pm<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:35pm<b>snoop_hoggy_hog</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:21am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 4:47pm<b>amandagedaria</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 10:28pm<b>Berber260</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:05pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 12:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 3:05pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:54pm<b>moldypickles</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:34am<b>MrBlue999999</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 11:27pm<b>sethsmith11</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:02pm<b>hafyyyy</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 1:41pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:02am

amrik's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of amrik's badges

amrik's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

by funnymanjoe / 09/14/2011 at 7:06am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

by Andrew / 08/23/2011 at 10:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 1:38am / Canada / Love

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

by 44haley44 / 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I spent the entire day in my room trying to figure out how to get rid of my psycho boyfriend without dying. FML

by illenram06 / 07/11/2011 at 11:37am / Philippines (Roxas) / Love

Today, my genius boyfriend was trying to remember a particular island in the Caribbean that was used by pirates in the past. I offered up Morocco. I heard him facepalm over the phone. FML

by Derp-A-Herp / 05/27/2011 at 1:46am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I wore a Super Mario Brothers T-shirt to school that showed a picture of Mario with a mushroom above his head. I got suspended for "referencing illegal drugs". FML

by Sola / 05/11/2011 at 12:10am / Geek

Today, my dad cussed out an individual on the phone because he thought it was a telemarketer. He was my Indian girlfriend's father. FML

by dollarstorepwnr / 03/19/2011 at 1:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:22am / United States (California) / Work

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

by Someone / 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML

by Embarrassed / 02/03/2011 at 7:28pm / Intimacy

Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML

by JordanVilleneuve / 01/27/2011 at 10:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

by Gabriel A / 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy