About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.
amelia_suhayda's FML badges
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs
Today, while changing the litter in the cat box, the brand new carton ripped open, spilling all twelve pounds of cat litter over my kitchen floor. Both cats promptly rushed over and began frantically urinating all over it. FML
by misfitunfit / 11/10/2015 at 8:24pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
by Eternal_Babyface / 11/08/2015 at 12:14pm / United States / Work
Today, I realised how damn creepy I am because I get nervous and smile when someone looks at me, and no it's not one of those smiles you'd love looking at, it's a smile straight out of a horror movie. I made a bunch of children run away. FML
by Hipnog / 11/07/2015 at 9:33am / Czech Republic / Miscellaneous
Today, I hit it off with a girl at a club and I brought her back to my place. I was sure I was finally going to score, until my useless cat attacked her as we walked upstairs. She fell down the stairs and dislocated her ankle. Just my luck. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2015 at 2:12am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy
by GoldenSteve / 11/05/2015 at 10:31am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Quicky5_ / 11/03/2015 at 1:58am / United States (Alabama) / Work
by 2pale / 11/01/2015 at 1:22pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by guessthatsatrickthen / 10/31/2015 at 1:19pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Miscellaneous
Today, when I went out to get some groceries with my mother, a small girl came up to me and said I was an "ugly egg" because I'm a bald girl. I had to shave my head in order to have brain surgery to relieve me of the symptoms of my neurological disorder. FML
by an egg / 10/30/2015 at 9:43am / United States (Michigan) / Health
by qourt / 10/29/2015 at 11:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided it was time to have "the talk" with my daughter, after I found a thong in the washing machine. She denied it was hers and pointed out how it was too big to fit her. I ended up having a very different talk with my son. FML
by caroline / 10/29/2015 at 4:02pm / Germany / Kids
Today, I was supposed to start my vacation in Italy. I guess not everyone heard that I canceled it due to health problems, because this morning I caught two of my "friends" unplugging my TV after breaking into my house. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2015 at 11:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I tried to hold my new boyfriend's hand while on a date. He let go quickly though, letting me know that we aren't at "that stage" of the relationship yet. We've been having sex for two weeks now. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2015 at 12:10am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
by CollegeKid / 10/27/2015 at 6:28am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by snydeeli000 / 10/26/2015 at 11:41pm / United States (Washington) / Animals