Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Search for a member

amelia_suhayda
  • Town/Country : Reno , United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 December 1990 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 671
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

amelia_suhayda's last visitors

woRRdzjjmiller1001DismissedOwl5carry_onSemperfi92340TheRealJustin_Oefelshwaffule365homiwanwhiplash2289lmfaowhatevercoleiab125

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68756) - you deserved it (3075)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I answered a call at work from a very irate gentleman. After being shouted and sworn at profusely, I ended the call in a slightly less than civil manner. Turns out that guy is one of our company's biggest clients. FML

#20615900
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24943) - you deserved it (35547)

On 04/23/2013 at 2:25pm - work - by hatemyjob (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML

#20615694
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55466) - you deserved it (6767)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Soundofaboner - United States

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

#20615168
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65947) - you deserved it (8120)

On 04/23/2013 at 2:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

#20613283
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41900) - you deserved it (2617)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm - health - by shatMyself - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44805) - you deserved it (7228)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was feeling really sick at work. I messaged my boss whether his girlfriend, who also works there, could cover me. He then came down, shouting at me that whatever illness I have, I've also passed on to his girlfriend. I'm pregnant. FML

#20612786
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41664) - you deserved it (2803)

On 04/22/2013 at 9:22am - work - by work -_- - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28573) - you deserved it (94392)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, after a few weeks of my friends pestering me to spend time with a mutual friend, I realized we had a lot in common. We both love shoes, peanut butter, and it appears that my boyfriend of three years is her boyfriend of four years. FML

#20612533
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60208) - you deserved it (3913)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:58am - love - by Stupid (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument. Naturally, I drove over to my best friend's house for comfort. My boyfriend saw me driving past his house and promptly broke up with me for being "a psycho stalker." She lives across the street from him. FML

#20612336
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42848) - you deserved it (4855)

On 04/22/2013 at 1:06am - love - by And you think I'M crazy? (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML

#20611911
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35663) - you deserved it (12258)

On 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm - misc - by Magicali (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

#20611227
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48661) - you deserved it (2867)

On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML

#20611067
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37813) - you deserved it (2814)

On 04/21/2013 at 6:27pm - money - by wallet? GONE (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML

#20610275
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36488) - you deserved it (4934)

On 04/21/2013 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I was trying sell a customer a top-of-the-line surround sound system. Apparently he was aware that I work on commission, as he threatened to buy the system elsewhere unless I sang Rebecca Black's "Friday" in front of the whole store. Goodbye, self-respect. FML

#20610052
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37595) - you deserved it (4430)

On 04/21/2013 at 12:03pm - money - by a little less poor at least (man) - United States (Tennessee)



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML’s Roommates from hell
  • If we could, we’d probably all live on our own. Exotic dancers would do our cleaning and housework; bartenders would serve us glamorous cocktails with mini paper umbrellas in them every hour on the dot. We would…

Monday 20 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: