Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Search for a member

amelia_suhayda
  • Town/Country : Reno , United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2479
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About amelia_suhayda : I enjoy, among other things, cooking and music.

amelia_suhayda's last visitors

socoldmusic13Ttsteisskillerpenguin4Llamasssssouthernbelle_rnAkstaiHiccupBSSemperfi92340ssgtgalloCplLawrencehansensteven1994

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend made me sit in his kitchen while he Skyped his mother because he doesn't "feel ready" to tell her he has a girlfriend. He's 23, lives on a different continent and has been dating me for over 6 months. FML

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML

#21100221
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40863) - you deserved it (2964)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, while searching a woman for contraband as part of my job, she kept making sexual noises throughout. After I finished, she hugged me and went on her way. I really need a new job. FML

#21099601
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35381) - you deserved it (3739)

On 03/29/2014 at 7:07pm - work - by ohdear. (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my wife got her period. Every single time, she ends up asking me to go buy her some midol after a few days of trying to tough it out, so I decided to buy her some ahead of time. She reacted by yelling at me for treating her like a child and implying that she couldn't go buy it herself. FML

#21098714
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38584) - you deserved it (3830)

On 03/28/2014 at 5:43pm - love - by unappreciated husband (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML

#21098671
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35467) - you deserved it (4252)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML

#21098658
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33456) - you deserved it (2576)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm - work - by IDIOT (man) - United States

Today, I took my 12 year-old to the orthodontist. While I was talking to the dentist about what was needing to be done, my daughter listened. With a straight face, the dentist joked, "Yeah, we're going to need to rip off her entire jaw." My daughter won't leave her room anymore. FML

#21098025
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36323) - you deserved it (4236)

On 03/27/2014 at 8:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39628) - you deserved it (5593)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

#21097979
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39801) - you deserved it (5423)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, after years of frustration, I got a t-shirt printed that says, "I am a girl". FML

#21097950
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33668) - you deserved it (4748)

On 03/27/2014 at 6:34pm - misc - by mookiemookie01 (woman) -

Today, a bee flew into my classroom and landed on my cheek. Not only am I allergic to these things, I was hit in the face with a textbook to "make sure it's dead." FML

Today, I wanted to eat my last bowl of sugary cereal before starting my new diet. I fell down the stairs with the full bowl in hand. Message received, universe. FML

#21097759
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35909) - you deserved it (6764)

On 03/27/2014 at 2:10pm - health - by bonbon789 - United States

Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML

#21097212
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36290) - you deserved it (2930)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - work - by homeless - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my teacher told us at least 7 different stories about his cat, Jeremy, and how much he eats. And he wonders why we never get anything done in his class. FML

#21097211
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32545) - you deserved it (2687)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - animals - by alicia75 - United States (Indiana)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: