About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/16/2016 at 9:56am / Netherlands / Miscellaneous
Today, my cat was being surprisingly loving towards me. Normally she ignores me so I obviously found this rather odd. She kept meowing so I assumed she was hungry. As I was getting up to feed her, she stood up and pooped all over me, my bed and phone, then turned away and ran. FML
by sippinsoup22 / 02/15/2016 at 8:25pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of) / Health
Today, a teacher told me in all seriousness that she believes my son, who has severe learning difficulties, is likely demonically possessed. I'm sorry, but what century are we living in? Now I have to get him moved to another school so he doesn't have to be in the care of this nutjob. FML
by Anonymous / 02/12/2016 at 1:47pm / United States (California) / Kids
by scarredforlife / 02/12/2016 at 4:00am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Intimacy
by not satisfied / 02/11/2016 at 12:06pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, after finding out that my professor likes to talk trash about, and constantly belittle, Muslims in every American History class he teaches, I submitted an essay about Muslim contributions to humanity. He held me back after class and asked why I gave him such filth. I'm a Muslim. FML
by Upset / 02/03/2016 at 1:14pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I tried to explain autism to my classmates. One of them, a professional cunt who's always looking for an excuse to lecture people, accused me of being "ableist" because my explanations weren't accurate, and said I shouldn't explain things I don't understand. I'm actually autistic. FML
by Ishikur / 02/03/2016 at 8:33am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
Today, my dad thought it was a great idea to text me and say he decided to put our dog down. I was in the middle of class and still had hours left at school. It's not fun to walk across campus holding back tears. FML
by wideeyeddays / 02/02/2016 at 3:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the gym. I'm 360 lbs and have finally decided it's time to change that. Some girl and her two bitch friends thought it'd be fun to follow me and belittle me at everything I did. When I mentioned it to the staff, they said that they were just "encouraging" me. FML
by Anonymous / 02/02/2016 at 5:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, it's been about 8 months since I moved into my studio flat. It was already furnished, there was no bed but a fancy bedseat from Ikea. I slept uncomfortably on it for months until I realised it pulls out to become a double bed. FML
by notsoproudfather / 02/01/2016 at 10:54am / India (Maharashtra) / Kids
Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 11:35am / United States (Kansas) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/26/2016 at 5:22pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Work
by ugh / 01/23/2016 at 3:48pm / United States (California) / Transportation
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…