Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Offline (the 03/27/2015 at 6:39am) | Search for a member

amelia_suhayda

2Liked!

amelia_suhaydaamelia_suhayda
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 December 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12296
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.

amelia_suhayda's page activity

Visits<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56pm<b>abkfml</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 9:32am<b>Jason89</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:07pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:45pm<b>xxthechosenguyxx</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 4:42pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:08pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:05am<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 5:06pm<b>roza_and_dimka</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:43pm<b>whitty06</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 7:30am<b>darnellq</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:31am<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:47am<b>Mathis92987</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:28pm<b>rgnrk</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:48pm<b>Amo1216</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 7:41am<b>youngsparrow</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:01am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:17am<b>SlashingAverV2</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:32am

Liked!<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:18am<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:51am

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, after listening to a group of my friends ranting on about how much they love babies and can't wait to have them, I got to witness their looks of horror and disgust as I expressed my desire to not have children. I also happened to be the only girl there. FML

#21335310
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29320) - you deserved it (3040)

On 01/11/2015 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being insecure and feeling threatened by the fact that she has a daughter from a previous relationship. She's vaguely right; I feel threatened, but mainly because the psycho keeps threatening to stab me to death when her mom isn't around to hear. FML

#21334989
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31946) - you deserved it (2400)

On 01/11/2015 at 8:03am - kids - by StabStab (man) - Belgium

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

#21334608
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34755) - you deserved it (2359)

On 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

#21334531
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24216) - you deserved it (4265)

On 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went to the supermarket with my husband and kids. A crazy old man started yelling at us and challenged us to fight him outside. Security had to escort us to our car. Why was he so mad? Our cart momentarily blocked his path to the beef jerky samples. FML

#21334513
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28782) - you deserved it (2885)

On 01/10/2015 at 2:22pm - misc - by gotta_respond (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my fiancée got married. I did not. FML

#21334376
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43457) - you deserved it (2745)

On 01/10/2015 at 8:45am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, three weeks after my sister took in a wounded porcupine from our backyard and let it roam about the house, I learned that it sheds quills from time to time. How did I learn this? By stepping on three of said quills hidden in the carpet. I still have only managed to pull one out. FML

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

#21334215
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26286) - you deserved it (1916)

On 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were going to sext before going to sleep. It was very late, but I said I'd stay up for him. He sent a text asking me if I was ready. Me replying "yes" was the last thing I remember before I fell asleep on my horny boyfriend. FML

#21334154
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28927) - you deserved it (8865)

On 01/09/2015 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend gave me my first ever orgasm. Then he bitched me out for insulting his intelligence, saying it was "blatantly fake" and that "women don't orgasm like that". FML

#21334061
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33571) - you deserved it (2734)

On 01/09/2015 at 6:09pm - intimacy - by good2know (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to work and said hi to my boss. He reached towards me. I thought he was trying to give me a hug, so I awkwardly hugged him back. Turned out he was just trying to fix my shirt collar. FML

#21334002
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26550) - you deserved it (3774)

On 01/09/2015 at 4:17pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend bought a new toaster. It not only pops up the bread when done, it also beeps loudly. It makes me scream in terror every single time. My boyfriend has now vowed to "Toast 'til the end of time." It's going to be a long year. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she's afraid of my ex-wife. This is the third one in a row to use that very reason. The judge still won't accept my pleas for a restraining order. FML

#21333809
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33470) - you deserved it (2167)

On 01/09/2015 at 6:43am - love - by swimfaned - United States

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML

#21333775
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29916) - you deserved it (6117)

On 01/09/2015 at 4:11am - love - by pitytitty (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting at my computer, petting one of my cats, who was sitting on my lap. My other cat got jealous and tried to climb onto my lap as well. They ended up fighting. I was wearing shorts. FML

#21333736
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27427) - you deserved it (3679)

On 01/09/2015 at 1:44am - animals - by Crazy Cat Guy (man) - United States (California)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: