Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

amelia_suhayda

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5968
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.

amelia_suhayda's page activity

Visits<b>youngsparrow</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:01am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:17am<b>SlashingAverV2</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:32am<b>Matt_Hazard</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:37pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:41am<b>lan356</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:24pm<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:46pm<b>kanue28</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:53pm<b>16characters</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:12pm<b>fboy1588</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 5:35am<b>roza_and_dimka</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 10:09pm<b>austinn_lynn</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:53pm<b>RubenTheGreek</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 5:53pm<b>Vayu</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 4:44pm<b>subertm</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:50pm<b>shainj78</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:21pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:25pm

Liked!<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:51am

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML

#21281594
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21607) - you deserved it (3836)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:31am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

#21281510
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22813) - you deserved it (1625)

On 10/20/2014 at 12:53am - work - by are you kidding me - United States (Kansas)

Today, I caught my 15-year-old son trying to roll catnip into a joint and smoke it. FML

#21281464
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22655) - you deserved it (2854)

On 10/19/2014 at 11:48pm - kids - by Bad Dad - United States (Colorado)

Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML

#21281374
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24168) - you deserved it (2332)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm - kids - by team hit bella with a car (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22436) - you deserved it (3491)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21586) - you deserved it (5486)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because "Nobody's that happy without drugs". FML

#21280487
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33281) - you deserved it (2382)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33649) - you deserved it (4777)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33196) - you deserved it (3611)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24413) - you deserved it (48676)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31607) - you deserved it (4380)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41814) - you deserved it (2913)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my wife pressed a button in the elevator and quickly ran out, leaving me in there with my crying baby. When the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors opened on a wedding reception. The doors couldn't have taken any longer to close again FML

#21276854
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33703) - you deserved it (3178)

On 10/13/2014 at 11:42am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

#21276832
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34575) - you deserved it (6927)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - intimacy - by badplacerightnow (man) - United States (Texas)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: