ambowew

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Offline (the 11/15/2015 at 4:27am)

ambowew

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 August 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5962
  • Number of comments : 419
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ambowew : When I grow up, I hope my already masculine voice evolves into the rich baritone one of Severus Snape.

That is all.

Btw, Ima seedy Mexican, hiding in a closet near you.

ambowew's page activity

Visits<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 6:11pm<b>randomuserlolol</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 12:31pm<b>Sockturtle</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 4:24am<b>getindoe69</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 12:07pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:57pm<b>Michael978</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 2:10pm<b>uz101</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 7:43pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 8:07pm<b>namine120409</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 4:45pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 9:29pm<b>angrykid11</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 1:11am<b>refticon</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 1:14pm<b>coolhihi11</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 10:38pm<b>swimthenread27</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 5:47pm<b>cjl1028</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 9:31am<b>teentee401</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 11:52pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 3:35am<b>lenovot61p</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 9:35am

Fucked!<b>KittyKatKyrish</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 1:31am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:57am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:07am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:44pm<b>LoveNnyl</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 2:16pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 7:38pm<b>dudeman1212</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 9:06pm

ambowew's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of ambowew's badges

ambowew's favorite FMLs

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

by nerdygirl101 / 03/13/2010 at 12:27am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, on the way home from a night out, I crossed the main road in my town via the traffic lights. As I got to the other side, a guy turned to his two friends and 'whispered' with a look of disgust, "I would have run that one over." Thanks. FML

by thetallone / 02/23/2010 at 3:05am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML

by snorlax / 01/19/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat was yowling and meowing pathetically outside my door, I checked she had food, water, and she followed me back up to my room. She nestled down on the radiator behind my desk, then threw up all over it. The cat sick is stuck inside the radiator, and it smells just lovely. FML

by Stinkybedroom / 12/30/2009 at 8:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2009 at 12:22pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I found out that my dad has been having an affair. With my formerly favorite teacher. The best part? Yesterday, she announced to the class that she was pregnant. I clapped and congratulated her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I flew to see the guy that I've been in love with for 3 years. We spent the day at Walmart. To buy a plunger. After I blocked up the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2009 at 9:40pm / United States (Iowa) / Love

Today, I was DJing for a church event where I was stationed in the middle and everyone was sitting behind me. I walked over to get something to drink and eat and come back with glaring looks. My screensaver had came on with pictures of my naked girlfriend. FML

by terry / 11/01/2009 at 8:22pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to the dentist to have a cavity filled. Around halfway through the procedure, something broke the silence in the room. It was my dentist, who had farted. I had to smell his rancid flatulence for around the next five minutes. All the while, I had to keep my mouth wide open. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2009 at 3:48pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML

by ripfluffy / 09/28/2009 at 3:15am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2009 at 5:27am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

by re2K5 / 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm / Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto) / Money

Today, I was meeting the mayor of a major city as part of an internship program. Seated directly in front of him during his presentation on the budget crisis, he unleashed an enormous, foul fart in front of the entire audience. And then blamed it on me, everyone believed him. FML

by justdoingmyjob / 07/18/2009 at 4:10pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was at the waterpark. I decided to go down a slide shaped like a funnel. On the way down, my bikini bottom untied. Then I got lodged in a V shape, arse first, in the hole at the funnel exit, exposing myself to the entire pool until I could slither out. FML

by canadiankc / 06/03/2009 at 10:14pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous