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alpal264

Offline (the 05/08/2014 at 9:48pm) | Search for a member

alpal264

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 October 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8897
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alpal264 : Im just ur average guy.

alpal264's page activity

Visits<b>HeyHeyFishFillet</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 7:04pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 12:25pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 05/23/2012 at 6:58pm

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Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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alpal264's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad's conspiracy theory obsession hit a new level of stupidity when he blurted "false flag" because our toaster stopped working. FML

#20797881
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31615) - you deserved it (2737)

On 07/22/2013 at 4:19pm - misc - by facepalm (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

#20788707
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61443) - you deserved it (21910)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was marking exams. I then had to explain to many of the students that (a) pigs are not aquatic animals and (b) sharks do not have lungs. These are university students. FML

#20784658
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41842) - you deserved it (3641)

On 07/15/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by lame-o-prof (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (5321)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML

#20774208
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51668) - you deserved it (7630)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46775) - you deserved it (3301)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

#20766880
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44319) - you deserved it (4797)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:14am - misc - by StockedWithJuice (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was telling my girlfriend about how my parents are flying out to Japan today on vacation. She was shocked at how short the flight will be, because "It's on the other side of the world." We live in the USA, and it seems I'm dating a Flat Earther. FML

#20765797
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36902) - you deserved it (6740)

On 07/05/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

#20762710
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44971) - you deserved it (8976)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mother-in-lawyer threatened to sue me unless I took my professional wedding photographs off Facebook as she did not like that they made her look fat. She is over 300 pounds. FML

#20761484
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66550) - you deserved it (4232)

On 07/03/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Nicks - United States (Nevada)

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

#20751757
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49195) - you deserved it (2803)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:16am - health - by not cool (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

#20751029
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37356) - you deserved it (3496)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by smh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40945) - you deserved it (2952)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML



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