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alpal264

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

alpal264

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 October 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15465
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alpal264 : Im just ur average guy.

alpal264's page activity

Visits<b>HeyHeyFishFillet</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 7:04pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 12:25pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 05/23/2012 at 6:58pm

alpal264's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of alpal264's badges

alpal264's favorite FMLs

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46000) - you deserved it (3829)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

#21119972
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40056) - you deserved it (5087)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML

#21098658
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38045) - you deserved it (3150)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm - work - by IDIOT (man) - United States

Today, I got billed for $80 of Justin Bieber music. It wouldn't have been so bad if it were my daughter who bought it all, instead of my husband. FML

#21096936
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43853) - you deserved it (4255)

On 03/26/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by husbands addiction - United States (California)

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

#21095586
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40421) - you deserved it (3094)

On 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Vampprobs - United States (Michigan)

Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML

#21090158
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44307) - you deserved it (3872)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had an elaborate fantasy of what I would do if I became a cat and how I would make my way to my crush's house to be their cat. FML

Today, during class our teacher asked us, "Who is Uncle Sam?" A girl answered, "He's the guy who founded KFC, right?" I'm in an AP class and have to put up with these morons constantly. FML

#21071374
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44386) - you deserved it (4373)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

#21070288
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44769) - you deserved it (3929)

On 02/24/2014 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, I watched my brother attempt to cook some eggs without turning the gas on. FML

#21066280
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40309) - you deserved it (4882)

On 02/20/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my wife tried to report our neighbor's yard sale to the Better Business Bureau. FML

#21057520
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40531) - you deserved it (4771)

On 02/11/2014 at 8:37pm - money - by dumbwifehappylife (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML

#21049518
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59209) - you deserved it (6679)

On 02/03/2014 at 5:47pm - love - by well i'm fucked (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom announced to everyone that she wants at least ten grandchildren. I'm an only child. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I made love. She stared at her One Direction poster the whole time. FML

#21046460
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57462) - you deserved it (12319)

On 01/31/2014 at 6:50pm - intimacy - by mylifesucks (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53669) - you deserved it (6669)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States



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