Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ally_anonymous

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

ally_anonymous

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8988
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About ally_anonymous : Haaayio.
I'm Alyssa.
I barely use FML anymore..

ally_anonymous's page activity

Visits<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 7:28am<b>utrax</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:35pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 4:54pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 12:51am<b>krupa1901</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:47pm<b>LaurenLo</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:17am<b>sarah_riz</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:24am<b>ncbeach22</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:59pm<b>cjwayy</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:40am<b>sethe99</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:23pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 9:41pm<b>thenick_m</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:41pm<b>arigibbs6</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:38pm<b>Gr8wise1</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:20am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 12:44am<b>abylenee_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:56pm<b>random_dude42</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:17pm

ally_anonymous's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of ally_anonymous's badges

ally_anonymous's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister was on television. It would have been great if she weren't being handcuffed for burglary. FML

#12090028
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32136) - you deserved it (2838)

On 07/24/2010 at 7:21pm - love - by ghostyyy - Sent from mobile version

Today, while I was driving my 27 year old boyfriend 8 hours to a Pokémon event, he realized he didn't bring his DS with him. He cried about it. FML

#12085678
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39757) - you deserved it (19215)

On 07/24/2010 at 1:47pm - love - by juli (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25059) - you deserved it (49133)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML

#12027756
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46772) - you deserved it (5614)

On 07/21/2010 at 4:31pm - love - by highlandgirl10 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59428) - you deserved it (3641)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML

#11966338
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28363) - you deserved it (17664)

On 07/18/2010 at 5:47pm - misc - by anonmys - United States (California)

Today, my parents were ecstatic about sending me to an amazingly fun camp. I didn't know until I got there that it was a fat camp. FML

#11846674
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36428) - you deserved it (12032)

On 07/13/2010 at 5:22am - misc - by Sally - United States (California)

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

#11831310
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11438) - you deserved it (65225)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm - health - by jazthefish (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in the shops and the lights all of a sudden went out. I got really scared for no reason because it was pitch black and grabbed onto my mum's hand. When the light's got turned on I was holding on to a random guy's hand. FML

#9572677
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21538) - you deserved it (8693)

On 04/02/2010 at 7:33am - misc - by Gina - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML

#9068483
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10697) - you deserved it (19880)

On 03/14/2010 at 6:50am - misc - by Hatty (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

#8916376
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29520) - you deserved it (2538)

On 03/08/2010 at 9:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488
219 comments

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488
219 comments

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43165) - you deserved it (9579)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
454 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7226) - you deserved it (53520)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: