About ally_anonymous : Haaayio.
I barely use FML anymore..
About ally_anonymous : Haaayio.
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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
ally_anonymous's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML
by aranya / 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/16/2012 at 1:02pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by T3STI / 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by madseason / 05/06/2012 at 8:13pm / United States / Intimacy
by caitlinz5 / 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML
by Madeline Lee / 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm / France (Aquitaine) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 12:50am / Canada / Health
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 2:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by Jedi2500 / 02/15/2012 at 6:53pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/03/2012 at 2:58am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Kids
by suckstobefat / 01/22/2012 at 1:10am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…
- Today, I truly understood that I was in Germany when, in my workplace, during our lunch break, one… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s…