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allie2590

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allie2590

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 31892
  • Number of comments : 506
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About allie2590 : I'm the happiest snake of all!

allie2590's page activity

Visits<b>ChenEighty</b> - 7 hours ago<b>max2732</b> - 20 hours ago<b>Rodville</b> - yesterday at 7:57am<b>Jose2018</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 1:04am<b>thehouseisonfire</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 7:27am<b>BrookieAnn</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:32am<b>macorncob</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:43pm<b>iamjc</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 10:08am<b>Wiz_Of_Oz</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 2:20pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 7:21pm<b>NotBlargo</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:18am<b>Effulgence</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:27pm<b>prabhakaran</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 3:32pm<b>angeluv_2014</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:58pm<b>DungeonSlayer</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:28am<b>olpally</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 12:10am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:43pm<b>sallee23444</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:24pm

allie2590's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of allie2590's badges

allie2590's favorite FMLs

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24932) - you deserved it (6499)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23207) - you deserved it (4264)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46813) - you deserved it (1916)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46813) - you deserved it (1916)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
392 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33113) - you deserved it (2537)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was going through Facebook photos of a pep rally in the hopes that I'd be in at least one of them. I was in one alright. Pulling out a wedgie. FML

#20096548
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17332) - you deserved it (5050)

On 10/01/2012 at 8:50am - misc - by awks - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

#20095626
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30894) - you deserved it (4940)

On 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I fell asleep in class. One minute I'm listening to a lecture, and twenty-five minutes later, I'm waking up screaming in agony in front of everyone after biting my tongue in my sleep. FML

#20092439
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15211) - you deserved it (9574)

On 09/28/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44474) - you deserved it (3886)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#20066250
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16970) - you deserved it (67848)

On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)

Today, during my uncle's funeral, my four year old loudly asked, "Where's all the dead people?" FML

#20061073
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18618) - you deserved it (2118)

On 09/06/2012 at 9:56pm - kids - by Chouse - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML

#20056763
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8404) - you deserved it (51106)

On 09/04/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by Cherrish it - United States (California)

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, I was at a concert. It was dark and everyone was singing and waving their lit-up phones in the air. I was having a great time, until someone snatched my £200 phone out of my hand. FML

#20016571
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18712) - you deserved it (10225)

On 08/12/2012 at 7:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31023) - you deserved it (8567)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)



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