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allie2590

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allie2590

14Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 36598
  • Number of comments : 534
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About allie2590 : I'm the happiest snake of all!

allie2590's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - yesterday at 10:04pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 10:18am<b>britbear0731</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:41pm<b>helllno</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 6:03am<b>JHamm2121</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 9:57pm<b>_Mike_Hunt_</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 11:34pm<b>jesusfchrist</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 11:02pm<b>max_432</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:18pm<b>Noremac42</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 7:35am<b>knskzebeast</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:56am<b>TheJasonLi</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 3:27am<b>ariasmake1</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:49am<b>ksks1234</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:41pm<b>Wontonfon</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:00am<b>Greg_DGZ</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 9:39am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:35pm<b>ReallyHottChic</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 5:18pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:16am

Fucked!<b>TheJasonLi</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 9:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:40pm<b>FRAGILE</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:58pm<b>jessicadani</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:11am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:43am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:23pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:33pm<b>waitwhatsgoingon</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:25am<b>pennyprostitute</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:06am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:43am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:35am

allie2590's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of allie2590's badges

allie2590's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52368) - you deserved it (6595)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML

#21079127
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38960) - you deserved it (15654)

On 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I was trying to study for a test when my brother and his friends decided to play the chant game, meaning one person yells something weird and everyone else has to say it back without laughing. All I heard for about two hours was them yelling things like, "DICK NIPPLES." FML

#21069920
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37404) - you deserved it (3511)

On 02/23/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by DIY560 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59149) - you deserved it (6541) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (13374)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33492) - you deserved it (15691)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML

#20971381
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47885) - you deserved it (5019)

On 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44835) - you deserved it (6063)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I took my 13 year old fishing off the pier for dogfish. The only thing he caught was a piece of my ear. FML

#20952293
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38880) - you deserved it (3960)

On 11/10/2013 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I invited my boyfriend over to meet my new puppy. My dog decided to take a dump on his lap. He is now not talking to me because he thinks I trained my dog to do that. FML

#20934961
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40155) - you deserved it (4274)

On 10/26/2013 at 9:23pm - animals - by Puppy problems - United States (Vermont)

Today, the kid next to me asked me, in all seriousness, if gay people have feelings like regular people. I'm gay, and I have to sit next to this barnacle until June. FML

#20929195
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52930) - you deserved it (8965)

On 10/21/2013 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my gran came over for dinner, for which I had to go grab some supplies from the supermarket. I guess I should have locked my laptop, because when I came back, I found my gran had used my Facebook account to propose to my now-ecstatic girlfriend. FML

#20897003
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43388) - you deserved it (5876)

On 09/26/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by my gran is a cuntwaffle (man) - United Kingdom



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