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allie2590

Offline (the 02/03/2016 at 9:48am) | Search for a member

allie2590

17Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1990 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 37418
  • Number of comments : 534
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About allie2590 : I'm the happiest snake of all!

allie2590's page activity

Visits<b>rcarn</b> - yesterday at 10:14am<b>Ifuckedthefeartu</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:47pm<b>Vman1702</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 7:07am<b>Rich531</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 2:21pm<b>Peacheess</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:15pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:39am<b>taranoelr</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 7:40pm<b>noodlemantra</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 8:12pm<b>bduczer</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 8:45pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 5:48pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 12:02pm<b>wow2mylife</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 10:16pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:32pm<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 10:17am<b>wil1029</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 1:00am<b>RobertTheSPOOK</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 8:14pm<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 10:09am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:56pm

Fucked!<b>Rich531</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:21pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:55pm<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 11:06pm<b>TheJasonLi</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 9:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:40pm<b>FRAGILE</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:58pm<b>jessicadani</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:11am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:43am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:23pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:33pm<b>waitwhatsgoingon</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:25am<b>pennyprostitute</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:06am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:43am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:35am

allie2590's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of allie2590's badges

allie2590's favorite FMLs

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

#21316166
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34417) - you deserved it (4381)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by lateralligator - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML

#21312925
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32325) - you deserved it (6526)

On 12/07/2014 at 1:15am - misc - by Gassy and sassy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband shaved off his beard. Turns out he looks like my ex. FML

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30569) - you deserved it (3629)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML

#21282364
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33146) - you deserved it (3328)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:41am - kids - by Bald (man) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37404) - you deserved it (3907)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47907) - you deserved it (3421)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45714) - you deserved it (12720)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38860) - you deserved it (9610)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46308) - you deserved it (15585)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51989) - you deserved it (4470)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was waiting for the train, a woman sat next to me. Her dog jumped up between us and I started petting it. She took this to mean we were now close enough for her to tell me in detail about her experience so far going through the menopause. FML

#21228437
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38430) - you deserved it (4258)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

#21216984
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43132) - you deserved it (26517)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:55am - intimacy - by teegtwo (woman) - United States



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