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allie2590

Offline (23 hours ago) | Search for a member

allie2590

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 33053
  • Number of comments : 523
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About allie2590 : I'm the happiest snake of all!

allie2590's page activity

Visits<b>mozilicious</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 6:56pm<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 2:24pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 12:34am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:47pm<b>cjwayy</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 5:34pm<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:55pm<b>akorpija</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 3:19pm<b>Acid1260</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 1:44pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:23pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 3:19pm<b>Smokindevil</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 3:41pm<b>agustibaarn</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:07am<b>FlowerMama</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 10:46pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:42pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:51am<b>squirrel13</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 8:51pm<b>andersonj219</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Dramori</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 8:44am

Liked!<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:43am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:35am

allie2590's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of allie2590's badges

allie2590's favorite FMLs

Today, my idiot sister had to have her aged dog put down, then she posts on MY Facebook page, "RIP, Buddy, we'll miss you." My adult children and most of my friends thought I died. FML

#21145745
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43860) - you deserved it (4308)

On 05/19/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by SmittyJA24 - United States (Idaho)

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48671) - you deserved it (4422)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41591) - you deserved it (6663)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark only to discover it was poo. After further investigation, I find out my younger sister had been wearing them and 'experimenting'. FML

#21104331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42506) - you deserved it (4141)

On 04/04/2014 at 10:17am - kids - by AshleyP - United Kingdom

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

#21087156
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46931) - you deserved it (8779)

On 03/15/2014 at 8:21am - kids - by emergencyroom (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51958) - you deserved it (6552)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML

#21079127
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36931) - you deserved it (14739)

On 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I was trying to study for a test when my brother and his friends decided to play the chant game, meaning one person yells something weird and everyone else has to say it back without laughing. All I heard for about two hours was them yelling things like, "DICK NIPPLES." FML

#21069920
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34997) - you deserved it (3287)

On 02/23/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by DIY560 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55790) - you deserved it (6186) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41447) - you deserved it (12505)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31050) - you deserved it (14731)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)



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