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alkaid

Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 4:44am) | Search for a member

alkaid

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 June 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2088
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About alkaid : Hello :)

alkaid's page activity

Visits<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 11:17am<b>OnePLAN</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:20pm<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 6:42am<b>hendy34</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 12:15am<b>Sinester69</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 9:09am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 2:27pm<b>f36k</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 10:41am<b>dtbaby01</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 10:12am<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:51am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:41am<b>bfsd42</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 8:22pm<b>greggly123</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 2:47pm<b>Biomed</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:26am<b>jmrgf</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 1:26am<b>superabsorBRENT</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 12:10am<b>Dblocker</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 9:38pm<b>calvinf94</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 11:42am<b>Rxp</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 12:50am

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alkaid's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

#19948524
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28005) - you deserved it (3157)

On 07/17/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by theuglyfriend (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18277) - you deserved it (4395)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML

#19933924
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27124) - you deserved it (6867)

On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, my boss grabbed my arm, raised it above my head, closed my other hand into a fist, and pushed it into his armpit. After staring at me for several seconds, he winked and left without saying a word. This isn't the weirdest thing he's done, and I'm actually starting to fear for my safety. FML

#19846175
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26537) - you deserved it (2145)

On 06/25/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by thinkimquitting (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

#19833560
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24113) - you deserved it (4093)

On 06/23/2012 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML

#19833260
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21525) - you deserved it (6865)

On 06/23/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML

#19833260
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21525) - you deserved it (6865)

On 06/23/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I divorced my husband of 20 years. The only positive thing about my day was my pregnancy test. Yes, it was his. FML

#19831438
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25302) - you deserved it (8024)

On 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by GM38 - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30806) - you deserved it (3857)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30806) - you deserved it (3857)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I bought some beef jerky. As I put the first piece in my mouth, I thought to myself, "Wow, this is tough enough to break a tooth." It was. FML

#19816534
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21979) - you deserved it (3013)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:22am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

#19775676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27080) - you deserved it (2668)

On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I was told off for not holding the door open for a woman behind me at work. Yesterday I was informed that chivalry is offensive to women, as it implies that they are not equal to men. I can't win. FML

#19774183
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26760) - you deserved it (3386)

On 06/11/2012 at 11:56pm - misc - by JohnBlack (man) - United States



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