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alkaid

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alkaid
  • Town/Country : alexandia, abudhabi, egypt,uae, egypt,uae
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1054
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About alkaid : Hello :)

alkaid's last visitors

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alkaid's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of alkaid's badges

alkaid's favorite FMLs

Today, I divorced my husband of 20 years. The only positive thing about my day was my pregnancy test. Yes, it was his. FML

#19831438
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20131) - you deserved it (5959)

On 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by GM38 - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25060) - you deserved it (3275)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25060) - you deserved it (3275)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I bought some beef jerky. As I put the first piece in my mouth, I thought to myself, "Wow, this is tough enough to break a tooth." It was. FML

#19816534
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16473) - you deserved it (2053)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:22am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

#19775676
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21250) - you deserved it (1914)

On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I was told off for not holding the door open for a woman behind me at work. Yesterday I was informed that chivalry is offensive to women, as it implies that they are not equal to men. I can't win. FML

#19774183
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21153) - you deserved it (2471)

On 06/11/2012 at 11:56pm - misc - by JohnBlack (man) - United States

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

#19743887
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10560) - you deserved it (31489)

On 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Rob (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that when my professor had said "For every A there will be an F," he was deadly serious. I earned a 94% mark, which in this class is known as a D. FML

#19684129
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18979) - you deserved it (1190)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:34pm - misc - by dany - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to take Viagra. FML

#19671113
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (4499)

On 05/24/2012 at 1:42am - intimacy - by aaah. (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I had to take Viagra. FML

#19671113
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (4499)

On 05/24/2012 at 1:42am - intimacy - by aaah. (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

#19650159
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19079) - you deserved it (1955)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML

#19636486
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16603) - you deserved it (2159)

On 05/17/2012 at 11:02am - love - by Vero (woman) - Austria (Oberosterreich)

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11061) - you deserved it (19406)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37216) - you deserved it (3020)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, my 20-year-old son's external hard-drive stopped working. He's crying on my shoulder now, not because of the movies, porn, work, or music he probably lost, but because of the now irretrievable complete series of Digimon that he'd collected. FML

#19629941
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15051) - you deserved it (3092)

On 05/15/2012 at 11:05pm - misc - by OytoBeAfather (man) - United States (New York)



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Monday 17 June 2013

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