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alice_in_mordor

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alice_in_mordor

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1513
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alice_in_mordor : ....

alice_in_mordor's page activity

Visits<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:45pm<b>medic8</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:17pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:06pm<b>buckeyefan16</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 12:30am<b>TheIlluminatii</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 7:34pm<b>woiz</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:40am<b>tapin360</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 9:03am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 1:33pm<b>kaliande</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 11:26am<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:38am<b>Medhi</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 6:02pm<b>olpally</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 10:05am<b>himwhomlaughs</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:49pm<b>RA91</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 7:29am<b>JRT1393</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 7:56pm<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 7:08am<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 6:21am<b>Jacob_G</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 2:24am

Liked!<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 4:50am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:35am<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:24am

alice_in_mordor's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of alice_in_mordor's badges

alice_in_mordor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84241) - you deserved it (223880)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

#1714855
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27419) - you deserved it (96672)

On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to donate blood for the first time. When they stuck the needle in my arm, I had a panic attack and begged that they take it out. The woman helping me told me she'd take it out in a moment and left. It was then that the Red Cross stole a pint of my blood while I had a panic attack. FML

#1674851
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46451) - you deserved it (16375)

On 05/05/2009 at 8:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my daughter said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML

#1509670
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60588) - you deserved it (11207)

On 04/30/2009 at 10:50pm - kids - by mylove (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

#966989
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51508) - you deserved it (18183)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67480) - you deserved it (19922)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, we were at the end of our surfing trip watching a photo montage. A picture popped up of an ugly girl surfing so I shouted out "I didn't know Shrek could surf". The room went very quiet. "Shrek" was sitting beside me. FML

#850097
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13581) - you deserved it (159580)

On 04/07/2009 at 7:46am - misc - by Brastro (man) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55326) - you deserved it (8881)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

#717975
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (83475)

On 03/31/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Alex (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML

#681492
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26586) - you deserved it (80477)

On 03/29/2009 at 3:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was going through my old MSN conversations. I then realized that when I first got MSN, I didn't know that messages you sent after people went offline would be delivered to them when they signed in. I used to type 'I love you' to my crush after every time he went offline. FML

#665920
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31807) - you deserved it (83971)

On 03/28/2009 at 6:13pm - love - by WeezysBaby (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

#644123
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82596) - you deserved it (16353)

On 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by badmom (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

#618069
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34271) - you deserved it (124830)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)



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