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alexx096

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alexx096

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 2 October 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 831
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Visits<b>challan</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 12:57am

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alexx096's favorite FMLs

Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML

#19307115
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7912) - you deserved it (42035)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

#19261628
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30798) - you deserved it (4083)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

#19207829
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32127) - you deserved it (4902)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:23am - intimacy - by virginkiller (man) - Singapore

Today, I had to leave the movie theater early because I couldn't fit in the chairs. I guess I'll see it when it comes out on DVD. FML

#19118368
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14531) - you deserved it (51281)

On 02/19/2012 at 10:00pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36311) - you deserved it (2648)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I saw my girlfriend at the store and joyfully greeted her. She got really mad at me - it was her identical twin sister, who I still cannot tell apart from my girlfriend. We've been dating for three years. FML

#19018043
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24348) - you deserved it (18748)

On 02/07/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML

#18918439
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25429) - you deserved it (4142)

On 01/26/2012 at 6:50pm - health - by Bailyboo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

#18813229
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29028) - you deserved it (23163)

On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML

#18753577
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30556) - you deserved it (5777)

On 01/09/2012 at 1:14am - love - by Whyme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML

#18674490
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10398) - you deserved it (28545)

On 01/01/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by msnewyearseve - United States (New York)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52177) - you deserved it (10682)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML

#18458873
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29293) - you deserved it (3668)

On 12/08/2011 at 5:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML

#18429181
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43630) - you deserved it (3547)

On 12/04/2011 at 5:47pm - love - by Mary - United States

Today, a guy lost control of his umbrella in the wind, which then hit me in the eye, making me bleed. He screamed at me for trying to steal his umbrella. People laughed. FML

#18386574
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31829) - you deserved it (1877)

On 11/29/2011 at 6:59pm - misc - by anon - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML

#18281989
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25794) - you deserved it (2792)

On 11/18/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)



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