About alcoholmage : I've got nothing much to say :L As a high-schooler, I occasionally find time to go on FML for reading when I have nothing to do ):
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Today, my daughter in law sent me another romantic text that was meant for her husband. Not only can't she spell for shit, the clichés she uses are horrifyingly embarrassing. The fact this keeps happening makes me want to slam her head in the oven. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (3106)
On 11/12/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by Username - United States
Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23135) - you deserved it (2535)
On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)
Today, without telling me, my mom dropped me off at my grandmother's house, and drove off. Now I'm supposed to spend the next month with her. Guess she forgot my grandma died six weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38085) - you deserved it (1931)
On 10/24/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by lonely - United States (California)
Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11326) - you deserved it (33195)
On 10/22/2011 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14284) - you deserved it (40968) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71653) - you deserved it (9143)
On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I went to my doctor for a check-up. It started with the doctor lifting my shirt up to check my heartbeat, and ended with my gran starting a fistfight over his "perverted ways." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21580) - you deserved it (1972)
On 08/27/2011 at 3:45am - health - by sad child - United States (New York)
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28884) - you deserved it (8539)
On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32909) - you deserved it (3156)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32697) - you deserved it (2863)
On 08/07/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by Taylor D - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mother took 350 dollars from savings to go to a psychic. But it's okay though, because now I know I'm an "ancient soul from another dimension". An "ancient soul" who now has no money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21389) - you deserved it (2257)
On 08/03/2011 at 11:49am - money - by Teen With No Money (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while at the beach, I was mistaken for Snooki. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39867) - you deserved it (18533)
On 07/07/2011 at 11:12am - misc - by Unknown - United States (Missouri)
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23761) - you deserved it (11654)
On 07/04/2011 at 12:09pm - health - by hero to zero - United States (New York)
Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26800) - you deserved it (2304)
On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to the movies with my friend and two pretty girls. During the movie, he made out with both of them, while I sat there awkwardly and watched the movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37432) - you deserved it (4230)
On 06/18/2011 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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