About albow2dking007 : Just Ask
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Perfectionist
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I got a text message from a number I don't know saying "I'm sorry, but I'm cheating on you, I couldn't do this in person because you're ugly when you cry." I haven't had a relationship in 6 years and I still manage to get dumped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29688) - you deserved it (1944)
On 08/26/2011 at 7:09am - love - by j_babydoll6520 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went to a club. The only guy who asked me to dance introduced himself as "Bird Dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18671) - you deserved it (2322)
On 08/26/2011 at 3:35am - love - by EpicMayonnaise (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot of strange movements to keep my body floating. While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water. I'm a 20 year old guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17223) - you deserved it (5738)
On 08/26/2011 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had an interview for an internship at an independent lawyer's office. Hoping to increase my chances of being hired, I dressed up sexily with a short skirt, high heels, and ample cleavage. Turns out his wife handles the interviews. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7069) - you deserved it (69280) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML
I agree, your life sucks (30511) - you deserved it (1872)
On 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23227) - you deserved it (3383)
On 08/25/2011 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by shocked (man) - United States
Today, I got tipped more than I have in my bank account. It was $5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20278) - you deserved it (4097)
On 08/25/2011 at 6:16am - money - by Topher (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22146) - you deserved it (3020)
On 08/25/2011 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Puppy Loverr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25612) - you deserved it (2645)
On 08/25/2011 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I walked in on my new college roommate holding his cock. He said "Hi I'm Jeffrey, and this is Jeffrey junior" while directing attention towards his penis. It's going to be a long semester. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28925) - you deserved it (2174)
On 08/25/2011 at 1:26am - intimacy - by InAnAwkwardSituation - United States (New York)
Today, life gave me lemons, delivering them straight to my nuts via my neighbor's tennis ball shooter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18862) - you deserved it (1633)
On 08/25/2011 at 12:24am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22055) - you deserved it (4295)
On 08/23/2011 at 5:55pm - kids - by BerzerkelyBongBabe (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7057) - you deserved it (31839)
On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14712) - you deserved it (36633)
On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)
Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (1786)
On 08/23/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by kykynevs - United States (Illinois)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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