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albow2dking007

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albow2dking007

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 January 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2150
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About albow2dking007 : Just Ask

albow2dking007's page activity

Visits<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 7:43pm<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 9:43pm<b>Camy321_x3</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 12:57am<b>abbyycarper</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 10:44am<b>fayman</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 6:36pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 6:33pm<b>Lennox_B</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 7:23am<b>EmilianaLondon</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 10:53pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 5:05pm<b>Ergayles</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 12:54am<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 12:11pm<b>kakalynn16</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 1:25pm<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 7:31am<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:46pm<b>chelseaaababyyy</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 9:49pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 12/15/2011 at 12:58am<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 9:39pm<b>Nimmrodel</b> - the 09/18/2011 at 9:28am

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albow2dking007's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15135) - you deserved it (31328)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20933) - you deserved it (237655)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

#17708928
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28732) - you deserved it (3786)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband went downstairs to play Call of Duty. When he came back after only 20 minutes I said, "Awww, did you miss me?" He said, "No, the controller died." FML

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

#17708531
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9435) - you deserved it (47232)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom baked cupcakes for my visiting grandparents. Later, I saw my grandpa chowing down on them. Even later, my mom demanded to know why there were a dozen cupcake wrappers on my bed. I've essentially been framed by my own grandpa, and am now grounded for a month. FML

#17707171
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30585) - you deserved it (2417)

On 09/09/2011 at 9:57pm - kids - by why?! (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

#17706134
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15370) - you deserved it (49247)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by omfgnooo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35037) - you deserved it (6143) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I found out that all the everyday Spanish words and phrases my boyfriend has been teaching me have very vulgar meanings. I found this out after I said a few to our waitress. FML

#17705736
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22473) - you deserved it (5828)

On 09/09/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, to save money, I bought some meat in bulk. When I got home, I was told that power to the neighborhood was out, and probably would be for days. Rather than let the meat rot, I barbecued it all and gave it away to my neighbors. The power came on while everyone was eating. FML

#17705192
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28889) - you deserved it (3873)

On 09/09/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by SoCalStoopid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

#17701196
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20317) - you deserved it (11976)

On 09/09/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Krystyn Gareau - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I needed to pay off a $35 parking ticket. To try and get some sort of revenge, I went to the bank and got 3,500 pennies, dumped them into a bucket, and refused to pay with anything besides the pennies. They called the police. I was arrested and cited $147. FML

Today, I was on the phone with Microsoft Customer Service for about a total of 2 hours. That's the longest I've ever talked to anybody. FML

#17700838
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21277) - you deserved it (3939)

On 09/08/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Juicy12Jham - United States (Texas)

Today, the only thing my downstairs neighbor wanted to talk about with me is how she can hear us go to the bathroom. She also claims that she can tell which one of us is going, based on the noise level. FML

#17699997
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22449) - you deserved it (1999)

On 09/08/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by monochrometea (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

#17699087
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37578) - you deserved it (4560)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by waj9876 - United States (Kentucky)



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