About alanvazquez1 : My name is Alan but I go by Juan. I'm 19, I'm from L.A. But live in Dalton, Georgia now. I like to work on cars and go out with my friends. I'm taking a few college classes on the side to try and continue my education.
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Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15543) - you deserved it (1716)
On 08/29/2012 at 12:52am - money - by anon - United States (Maine)
Today, I came home from work to find my house was flooded from a broken pipe under the sink. My house had just recently had new wood floors, carpet and electrics installed because 6 months earlier my house had been flooded by the same pipe breaking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16824) - you deserved it (1989)
On 08/29/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by me - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18826) - you deserved it (3796)
On 08/28/2012 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, yet again, I was getting intimate with my shower head. Some complete genius decided to flush the toilet downstairs halfway through, which sent scalding-hot water all up in my privates. I've yet to find a comfortable sitting position. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11434) - you deserved it (25942)
On 08/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Bethany (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had a piano exam. My friend noticed how nervous I was, and recommended that I compliment the examiner for higher marks. When it was time for the exam, without thinking, I told him I liked his hair. Turns out bald people don't like that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5053) - you deserved it (18603)
On 08/28/2012 at 4:38pm - misc - by p (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, wanting to be on time for my first job interview, I woke up at the crack of dawn and walked almost an hour through a thunderstorm. When I arrived, I was told that the manager wasn't in today, because of the bad weather. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17152) - you deserved it (1072)
On 08/28/2012 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I learned that several thousand people in my state got tickets this month for driving and talking on the phone. My mom called to tell me this while I was driving. I'm now part of that statistic. Thanks, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6778) - you deserved it (21159)
On 08/28/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by ticketed - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14581) - you deserved it (1475)
On 08/28/2012 at 11:56am - love - by StillBetterThanTwilight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16681) - you deserved it (2570)
On 08/28/2012 at 10:16am - love - by tutusaurus - United States (California)
Today, I got married. My booze-hound mother made a toast, and told a story about how she once walked in on us having sex. My husband's family is very religious, and we told them we weren't having sex until marriage. Thanks mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21175) - you deserved it (6727)
On 08/28/2012 at 1:08am - intimacy - by gotta love my momma - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24357) - you deserved it (4963)
On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21052) - you deserved it (1070)
On 08/27/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I wore an expensive vintage blazer which I'd purchased at a market in Paris. Turns out my colleague has the exact same one, only hers is from a clearance rack at Target. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13317) - you deserved it (5669)
On 08/27/2012 at 8:10pm - misc - by arh (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5469) - you deserved it (22147)
On 08/27/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend came over to see me after almost a month of us not spending time together. Unfortunately, he came straight from bar-hopping with his friends and was wasted. He's currently naked in bed, cooing at his penis, and giggling like a little girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17501) - you deserved it (2121)
On 08/27/2012 at 8:57am - love - by kvdfan (woman) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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