alanvazquez1

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Offline (the 09/01/2016 at 1:51am)

alanvazquez1

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alanvazquez1
  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5419
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alanvazquez1 : My name is Alan but I go by Romeo. I'm 22, I'm from L.A. But live in Georgia now. I like to work on cars and go out with my friends. I'm taking a few college classes on the side to try and continue my education.

alanvazquez1's page activity

Visits<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 10/18/2016 at 12:39am<b>2simz</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 1:21am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 8:17am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 2:29am<b>melisssa87</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 8:53am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 1:59am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 11:59am<b>BBlah</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 7:28pm<b>nickthegoodkitty</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 7:09pm<b>val_is_lame97</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 2:46pm<b>qdawg06</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 1:40pm<b>klenorris</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:30am<b>benjamins39</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 7:32pm<b>hobojo69</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 1:26pm<b>averynicole18</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 9:47am<b>Cayers97</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 8:19pm<b>isabellasimone</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 10:43pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 4:31pm

Fucked!<b>melisssa87</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:53pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:30am

alanvazquez1's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of alanvazquez1's badges

alanvazquez1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

by Sinnersinner / 09/21/2014 at 7:27am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

by RuinedTheMood / 09/21/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2012 at 3:09pm / United States / Love

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

by smashed / 09/24/2012 at 10:33am / United States / Kids

Today, my step-brother had some serious bowel distress and rushed to the bathroom. Because he forgot to quit his group chat with his buddies, I quickly found out that the reason he's so over-protective, and hostile to my male friends, is because he wants to get into my pants. FML

by creepedasfuck / 09/23/2012 at 12:50pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at work, I helped my ex-husband pick out a ring for the girl he cheated on me with. FML

by Sad ex-wife / 09/21/2012 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Love

Today, my husband revealed that he found me drunk and shoe-less in a shrub in our front garden last night, sending dirty texts to my new employee. I've recently had my meds switched and apparently can't drink now. My husband's pissed, my shoes are gone, and I can't look the new guy in the face. FML

Today, my husband revealed that he found me drunk and shoe-less in a shrub in our front garden last night, sending dirty texts to my new employee. I've recently had my meds switched and apparently can't drink now. My husband's pissed, my shoes are gone, and I can't look the new guy in the face. FML

Today, my husband revealed that he found me drunk and shoe-less in a shrub in our front garden last night, sending dirty texts to my new employee. I've recently had my meds switched and apparently can't drink now. My husband's pissed, my shoes are gone, and I can't look the new guy in the face. FML

Today, as I left work for the parking lot, I noticed two full trashbags duct-taped to my car. They were marked as my property. According to the note left on my windshield, my ex-roommate thought he'd be kind enough to bring my things to me to save me the trip. FML

by Snickerfritz / 09/20/2012 at 5:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

by myself / 09/20/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML

by jitiizer / 09/19/2012 at 1:02pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my crazy mother-in-law threatened to camp out outside my house so she will "never get left out" of our lives, all because we called instead of sending a written invitation to my three-year-old's birthday party. I actually believe she's crazy enough to do it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2012 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous