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ajh557

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ajh557
  • Town/Country : none, of your business
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 343
  • Number of comments : 139
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About ajh557 : I'm god and my birthday proves it I swear

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100 kick ass comments

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ajh557's favorite FMLs

Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went up to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML

#20065827
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13281) - you deserved it (1218)

On 09/10/2012 at 2:06am - misc - by NotJessePinkmanFFS (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took my puppy for a walk around town. I had to stop and explain to several people that yes, his head was purple because my little sister wanted to make him look like a Na'vi from Avatar. FML

#20041954
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15051) - you deserved it (1861)

On 08/26/2012 at 12:18am - misc - by AmyLeigh - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML

#20035898
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18984) - you deserved it (1353)

On 08/22/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by XYZee - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML

#19979933
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5312) - you deserved it (49424)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12825) - you deserved it (24945)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, my dad made a new house rule: "If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down." My whole house now smells like pee. FML

#19082292
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (2210)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by Bondi414 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27407) - you deserved it (7422)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my family and I went over to our new neighbors' house, to sing a carol and say hello. The only response we got was a door slammed in our faces. FML

#18590219
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10022) - you deserved it (25796)

On 12/23/2011 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

#16519347
457 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9760) - you deserved it (111410)

On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a really bad cramp while I was swimming in my neighborhood pool. I started to go under until the lifeguard jumped in and saved me. I guess it would have been great, if I wasn't a fellow lifeguard. FML

#16215643
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21820) - you deserved it (4280)

On 05/16/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by t -

Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML

#16028485
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23615) - you deserved it (24164)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:22am - misc - by AE86Turbo (man) - United States (California)

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12421) - you deserved it (45480)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, my mum got an electric car. It's so quiet that we could hear the bones of my cat break as we reversed over it on the driveway. FML

#14919566
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52568) - you deserved it (7567)

On 02/10/2011 at 5:58am - animals - by flattened -

Today, I was dumped. I ran home and cried and ranted on and on to my mother. After about 10 minutes of talking, she threw a book at my face and said, "No wonder he dumped you! You can't shut up!" FML

#14718221
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21355) - you deserved it (11053)

On 01/26/2011 at 8:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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