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ajax_united

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ajax_united

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  • Number of visits : 354
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ajax_united : Spectatum veniunt veniunt spectentur

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Visits<b>SplitEnds</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:27pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:25pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 11:38am<b>Chixxapow</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:19am<b>JadeWinter</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 10:36am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:55am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:14am<b>biloxi_girl</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:59pm<b>Lindsey_Marie</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 7:27pm<b>A07</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 12:49pm<b>Ang19</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 8:45am<b>Nimmrodel</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 3:09am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:25am<b>becka2s</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 3:40pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 8:11am<b>the_untouchables</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 6:53am<b>Simbaby</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 11:32am<b>ob81</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:51am

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ajax_united's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

#21054451
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48089) - you deserved it (9502)

On 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47709) - you deserved it (8885)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend bought a onesie. He sleeps in it, goes out in it and won't take it off, not even for sex. FML

Today, my girlfriend wants to make a video of us having sex for us to watch later and figure out how to improve our skills in bed. The problem is her choice of cameraman: her uncle. FML

#20978171
202 comments

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54453) - you deserved it (7691)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML

#20399775
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33900) - you deserved it (8312)

On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32767) - you deserved it (5341)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41322) - you deserved it (19100)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML

#17215427
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36855) - you deserved it (9552)

On 07/22/2011 at 9:38am - intimacy - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

#15215941
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39982) - you deserved it (20734)

On 03/06/2011 at 6:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

#14129951
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47356) - you deserved it (5518)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14569) - you deserved it (54539)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15479) - you deserved it (67666)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States



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