About aj510 : I am a 14 year old black person. I play football. I am single and i love reading fmls. I am not a grammer nazi like somepeople. I know how to treat a lady i am not a jerk. If u want u can message me. Im on here erryday so bye.
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aj510's favorite FMLs
Today, I told my girlfriend about my extreme fear of flying roaches. She immediately got upset because she thought, since I'm from the Caribbean, I would be "manlier" and "eat stuff like that for breakfast". FML
by sammy77sam / 07/15/2013 at 9:41am / Saint Kitts and Nevis (Saint George Basseterre) / Transportation
Today, I held a house party. For fun, I made sure all the beer was alcohol-free, so I could see which of my friends would be weak-minded enough to end up acting drunk. Three did. I was one of them. FML
by scheisse / 07/14/2013 at 5:25pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Miscellaneous
Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML
by mile high clubber / 07/14/2013 at 6:41am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
by Blizzards / 07/14/2013 at 1:29am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 2:11am / United States (Iowa) / Money
by Your ass... Grab it... / 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I actually had to teach my 9-year-old brother how to pour himself a glass of milk, after he burst out in tears when my sister told him to do it himself. His astonishing ignorance also extends to basic hygiene. FML
by Anonymous / 07/04/2013 at 12:27pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Kids
by OnPlanetVenus / 07/04/2013 at 12:41am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy
by idk ask freud / 07/04/2013 at 12:11am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML
by vbecka / 06/26/2013 at 1:08pm / Norway (Oslo) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
Today, I faced my severe phobia of spiders in order to remove a rather large one from my home. After 20 minutes of desperate struggling, it was finally taken care of. Relieved, I sat down and glanced across the hallway just in time to see a second, equally large spider strutting across the wall. FML
by Lepisma / 06/26/2013 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 2:57am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML
by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm / United States / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…