About adamo_erebus : Studying to become a legal drug dealer.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5030) - you deserved it (37392)
On 01/27/2012 at 10:13pm - health - by smith (man) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16142) - you deserved it (4570)
On 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm - misc - by ParkerRommel (man) - United States
Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8446) - you deserved it (21143)
On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32245) - you deserved it (1920)
On 01/22/2012 at 12:09am - kids - by thosedamnkids (man) - United States (New York)
Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14358) - you deserved it (18878) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my Mom and I found out that we're allergic to the wood my Dad has been making fires with. She can't see, I can't breathe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19897) - you deserved it (1635)
On 12/24/2011 at 5:05pm - health - by AllergyRidden - United States (California)
Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24116) - you deserved it (2244)
On 12/19/2011 at 7:24am - kids - by dealingdave - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was working at the mall as Santa, when a little girl took a shit in my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (2956)
On 12/12/2011 at 4:45pm - kids - by Santa - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18877) - you deserved it (11181)
On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)
Today, was the last day of the prank war between me and my husband. I told him the last prank needed to be the best one. I took a shower and tried to think up my last prank. When I got out of the shower, my hair was green. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9634) - you deserved it (28454)
On 10/26/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by mycedes - United States
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24064) - you deserved it (5192)
On 10/25/2011 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by beccav23 - United States (Texas)
Today, I learned that the only reason most of my students come to lecture is that they have a running bet on how many times I say "OK" in two hours. It was 137 last week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17586) - you deserved it (8018)
On 10/19/2011 at 6:42pm - work - by Habit - United Kingdom (Leeds)
Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21974) - you deserved it (3451)
On 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm - kids - by myfamilyisodd (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23174) - you deserved it (4554)
On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29923) - you deserved it (22083)
On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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