About adamo_erebus : Studying to become a legal drug dealer.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I invited my very animal phobic boyfriend over. I have a dog and a rabbit, who are always well behaved so I insisted they wouldn't do him any harm. My dog peed all over his shoes and my rabbit furiously humped his leg and wouldn't let go. He's now even more terrified of animals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21594) - you deserved it (8245)
On 10/31/2009 at 7:08am - love - by Anon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I was walking in the park when I was hit on the shin by a red ball. I was confused, until it was followed by an enormous German Shepherd dog going at top speed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22275) - you deserved it (1583)
On 10/26/2009 at 12:24pm - health - by Lizofsmeg (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)
Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24937) - you deserved it (5049)
On 10/23/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my mother said she trusted me enough to go with me for my first drive in my new car. As soon as we got in the car, she started hyperventilating and screaming we're going to crash. I didn't even start the engine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27062) - you deserved it (2088)
On 10/10/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)
Today, I had to write a huge lab for my physics class. It's worth my entire quarter grade and I use a program on a CD for graphing. My mom thought it was a computer game and hid the CD. She can't find it. The lab's due tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30713) - you deserved it (2477)
On 10/05/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by Bento (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56533) - you deserved it (3659)
On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)
Today, my 11 year old son and I were going through some old photos. He saw one of me when I was 22 on a beach wearing a bikini. He said " Wow! Who's that?!" Quite proudly I said it was me. He looked at me and said " Whats happened?!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30211) - you deserved it (5500)
On 09/10/2009 at 5:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10355) - you deserved it (31213)
On 09/10/2009 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29537) - you deserved it (5412)
On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20301) - you deserved it (2621)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33656) - you deserved it (12810)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:30am - health - by pussyOUT (man) - United States
Today, I was hanging out with a group of friends when I got into a conversation with this really attractive girl who I've liked for months. She asked me what school I go to. I sit to her left in biology. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34890) - you deserved it (2777)
On 08/31/2009 at 8:40pm - love - by outofluckdude (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26077) - you deserved it (3493)
On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by sending me a Bumper Sticker on Facebook that said "Bitch, let's get married". FML
I agree, your life sucks (47974) - you deserved it (5688)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:40pm - love - by mylifesucks (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54697) - you deserved it (12531)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Monday 17 June 2013
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