About acneegg : Sup. I'm Alice and em yeah. Sorry I'm not in a very imaginative mood ;) Enjoy.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I made a bowl of spaghetti for my girlfriend and me. I tried the move from Lady and the Tramp where the boy and girl both slurp the same piece of spagetti and end up kissing. When I tried it, the spagetti went too down far my throat, and I ended up throwing it up on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35667) - you deserved it (19760)
On 07/06/2009 at 12:54pm - love - by spitballer1 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was cashiering at a grocery store when an elderly woman came through my line buying prune juice. She then whispered to me that last time she bought it, she "blew up her toilet". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31894) - you deserved it (1695)
On 06/26/2009 at 12:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was cashiering at a grocery store when an elderly woman came through my line buying prune juice. She then whispered to me that last time she bought it, she "blew up her toilet". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31894) - you deserved it (1695)
On 06/26/2009 at 12:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34357) - you deserved it (12116)
On 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm - misc - by meantowheels (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9241) - you deserved it (42242)
On 06/10/2009 at 12:36am - animals - by FMLTIMESTWO (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was with my 14 year old son when we saw a baby sparrow being attacked by four or five blackbirds. We rushed up, waving our arms and scared away the much bigger attackers. The baby sparrow ran toward us for protection, then went past both of us and ran straight down a storm sewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42000) - you deserved it (2945)
On 06/05/2009 at 12:56pm - misc - by Pierce (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17556) - you deserved it (41179)
On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17556) - you deserved it (41179)
On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17556) - you deserved it (41179)
On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44755) - you deserved it (2184)
On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend and I went down to the pier. I brought an empty bottle and some paper, and we both constructed a massive letter expressing our passionate love for each other. We stuck it in the bottle, and threw it out to sea, only to see it explode in slow motion on a protruding rock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36859) - you deserved it (9981)
On 05/23/2009 at 8:16pm - love - by CastAway (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my girlfriend and I went down to the pier. I brought an empty bottle and some paper, and we both constructed a massive letter expressing our passionate love for each other. We stuck it in the bottle, and threw it out to sea, only to see it explode in slow motion on a protruding rock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36859) - you deserved it (9981)
On 05/23/2009 at 8:16pm - love - by CastAway (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was sitting at a bus stop and a guy stops in front of me and says "Oh very nice. How much?" I reply "You couldn't afford me." An old guy sitting next to me says "I bet I could" and puts his hand on my leg. I forfeited the bus and walked home in the rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47055) - you deserved it (18379)
On 05/22/2009 at 6:52am - intimacy - by rice_cake (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23874) - you deserved it (51290)
On 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm - love - by zero_minded12 (man) - United States (Illinois)
I agree, your life sucks (56247) - you deserved it (2620)
On 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by lm (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Monday 17 June 2013
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